Drabbliophile
by Ghostboy814
Summary: n. One who loves Drabble.
1. Driving Lessons

Well, here it is-my series of short, unrelated oneshots. I hope that you all like them, and don't find them _too_ random.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

The Fenton RV backed out of its parking space at the Nasty Burger's parking lot and slowly made its way around the perimeter of the lot.

"Okay, I think you've got the hang of basic maneuvering. Time to take her onto the actual road." Sixteen-year-old Danny Fenton followed his father's instructions and brought the RV onto the road.

"Thanks for taking me driving, Dad."

"Danny, Danny, Danny. It's every father's job to teach their son how to drive. Just like shaving and the birds and the bees!" Danny rolled his eyes. "Now, if the speed limit sign says twenty, how fast should you be going?"

"Well, you once said that you could go up to 5 mph over the limit without getting a ticket so…25?"

"Wrong. The speed you go at is determined by the conditions of the road that day."

"Gotcha."

"Okay, so you're driving along at the limit, and it starts to drizzle lightly. What do you do?" Danny inched his foot off the acceleration and pressed the button that would turn on the windshield wipers.

"Very good, son! Now, the next thing you need to know is that a good driver is ready for anything. So, you're driving along and suddenly, A GHOST ATTACKS!"

"Dad, I really don't think-"

"GHOST! GHOST! GHOST!" Danny sighed and pressed the big red button that activated the RV's weapons. Four large energy guns popped out of the vehicle's interior.

"Okay, okay, I've activated the anti-ghost weapons."

"There, now that wasn't too hard, was it?" the RV pulled up to FentonWorks. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I really need to use the little ghost hunter's room." Jack jumped out of his seat and ran out of the RV and into the house.

"Dad, isn't there a bathroom in the RV?" Danny tried to ask, but the man was long gone. The halfa sighed and turned off the RV. All of a sudden, a portly blue ghost flew out of the house.

"I am the Box Ghost!" Danny eyed the big red button and grinned.


	2. Resumee

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Danny, Sam, and Tucker were walking to the Nasty Burger from school one afternoon. On the way, they were talking about an assignment that Lancer had given them that day.

"Man, I can't believe that we have to make a résumé of all the things we've done since the beginning of high school!" Tucker complained.

"At least it counts as part of that class's final exam. One less subject to study for, right?" Sam countered in an attempt to cheer her friend up.

"Easy for you to say! You've done so many protests and things like that you'll have a killer résumé! What have I got? It's not like I've done anything significant!" Danny snorted.

"You think you've got it bad? I save this town on a daily basis and even beat back the King of All Ghosts. That's a significant achievement, right? But can I put it down? Nooo, not if I want to keep my secret identity. You're pissed because you haven't done anything significant, but I've done plenty of significant stuff, I just can't admit to it."

"Danny, you know as well as any of us that you chose to be the hero because you were given awesome powers from another dimension. You can't complain now because you're not getting any recognition for being a hero; that would be selfish." Danny sighed at Sam's words.

"I know, it's just…I'm not that angry that I can't put down fighting ghosts on my résumé. I'm just frustrated that my time as Phantom could have been spent doing something worthwhile that _could_ go on." The three of them entered the Nasty Burger, ordered their milkshakes, and sat down in a booth. Acting on impulse, Sam held Danny's hands in her own and looked deep into his eyes.

"Danny, even though you've sacrificed so much to protect this town, you still find time to hang out with us and be our friend. And to me at least, that's worthwhile enough." Danny grinned.

"Thanks, Sam…"

"A-_hem_" Unfortunately for the two lovebirds, their private world was interrupted by Tucker's loud, fake cough. They realized that they were still holding hands and both of them turned away, blushing.

"Clueless…" the techno-geek muttered, then had milkshake poured on him.

* * *

We actually have to do this-a third of our English final is a resumee. Another third is a personal statement, like the ones that are part of the Common Application. And guess what my essay is about? That's right, DP! 


	3. CAT's

I had the grading system for the CAT's match the SAT's, only because I don't know how the ACT's are scored.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

"Danny, come down here!" Jazz's voice startled the young hybrid and woke him up. He groggily lifted his head up from his math homework and made his way downstairs to the kitchen.

"Whazzagoinon?" He mumbled.

"You're CAT scores came in the mail!" Jazz exclaimed as she held a white envelope up to her younger brother's face. Her high-pitched squeal was loud enough to totally wake him up.

"And you're so excited about this why?" he asked, acid dripping from his words.

"Because," she waggled her finger like one would when explaining to a two-year-old that they can't get every single type of ice cream that the ice cream truck is offering at the moment. "Because of my thesis on tutoring the untutorable. If you did well on this test, then that means that my tutoring was really effective, and that should be really helpful in proving my thesis!" She thrust the envelope into his hands.

"Well, are you going to open it or not?" She asked angrily and placed her hands on her hips.

"All right, all right, just give me a second…" Danny rummaged around for a Fenton Letter Opener and finally pulled one out of a drawer. He cut open the envelope in one swift motion. Danny unfolded the enclosed letter and held it up to the light.

"The moment of truth…" he said in a dramatic voice.

"Come on, Danny, tell me!" Jazz demanded.

"Should I? Or should I just leave you hanging?"

"Danny…"

"All right, all right…I got…on my CAT's…which I took a few months ago…and I'm just finding my score just now…I scored on said test…"

"Danny, if you don't tell me in two seconds I swear I'll suck you into a Fenton Thermos and throw it into the Ghost Zone." Danny pouted.

"Fine, be that way. If you insist, I got…2080." Jazz's face lit up.

"Really?"

"Uh…yeah…"

"Danny, that's great!"

"You mean it?"

"Duh, I mean it! Danny, you scored really well on this!" Danny grinned at her.

"I'm gonna go call Sam and Tucker." He ran out of the kitchen and up to his room.

"Good job, little bro," the redhead whispered to no one in particular, then headed upstairs to work on her thesis.


	4. Funeral

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Two friends stood silently and shivered in the slight drizzle as the coffin was being lowered into its final resting place. Both of them were dressed in black, although this was an everyday occurrence for one of them. Her morbid outlook on life dictated that she wear black all the time. The other one, however, was unused to looking at the world through death-colored lenses. Ironic for one who was partially dead himself.

"It…it's all my fault, Sam…" the boy stuttered as he hugged her tightly and sobbed onto her shoulder.

"It's not…"

"It is! If I'd just been quicker, I would've been able to stop Skulker's missile from hitting! It's my fault you two got dragged into helping me and the consequences are also my fault."

"Danny, no it's not. Tucker and I chose to become your sidekicks because we care about you and we want to help you in any way we can. Both of us willingly took a gamble, and Tucker just…lost."

"You shouldn't have to gamble your lives just for me," Danny asserted.

"Yeah, we shouldn't, but since when have things gone the way they should have? That portal should never have been built. I never should have convinced you to go inside. Other ghosts never should have come out. You never should have had to risk your neck on a daily basis for people who hate you. But all of those things happened anyway. I'll continue to risk my life for you, even though I shouldn't have to."

"Sam" he choked out, "that means so much to me…"

"Shh…" she silenced him by placing a finger on his lips and wrapped her arms around him. "Just relax, okay?" She felt him nod, and the two of them parted.

"Just one thing…" he mumbled. The halfa rummaged around in his pocket and pulled out a PDA. He turned the arm holding the device intangible and reached down into the ground. He placed the PDA in the coffin and pulled his hand back up.

"He deserves to have that with him when he stands before the Pearly Gates."

"You're right…" the Goth agreed. Her ghost boy wrapped an arm around her waist and leaned against her for support as they made their way out of the cemetery that dreary, September day.


	5. Heaven

Yeah, I know that these things are supposed to be unrelated, but I just couldn't resist. This one is the complement to the previous one, Funeral.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

The last thing Tucker Foley saw was Skulker shooting a large missile from his exo-skeleton. Out of the corner of his eye he noticed his best friend flying towards him at his top speed, possibly to take the hit instead, but he just wasn't fast enough. The missile grew larger and larger, then everything turned green and then black.

The inky darkness was slowly replaced by light as Tucker felt the sensation of rising. He continued to ascend and the light coagulated into clouds.

_What the…_The chocolate-skinned boy muttered to himself. His ascension came to a halt when he reached a pair of enormous golden gates that seemed to divide the section of cloud he was on from the rest of the cloud. A winged angel dressed in white robes stood at a small wooden podium next to the gates.

"Hello, Mr. Foley," the angel began in a melodious voice that reverberated around the cloudy sky.

"I…you…I'm in heaven, aren't I?"

"Not quite yet, you're not. I'm St. Paul, and my purpose is to usher you through into an eternity of bliss. We just have two minor glitches to sort out, and you'll be free to go."

"Glitches? What kind of glitches?"

"First, there was the time you transported many of your classmates, as well as your teacher, into a realm where you were king. You allowed your hunger for power to get the best of you, Tucker. This kind of behavior cannot be allowed in Heaven."

"What? That's not fair! I was being controlled! I mean, yeah, I was angry because nobody would listen to me, but I had always been able to keep my emotions in check. It was only after I touched that stupid scepter that I became a megalomaniac!"

"Well, since you _are_ capable of controlling your feelings, I suppose that we can let you slide…the only other problem is when you wished for powers just like your friend's. Coveting is a sin, Tucker, and we can't allow you into Heaven if you covet that which your friend possesses." Tucker sighed.

"I won't deny that I was jealous of Danny. But I learned the hard way that letting jealousy and rage get the better of me is dangerous for me and for my friends. I learned that my friendship with Danny was more important that something stupid like powers."

"Your explanation seems satisfactory. But, I can only let you in once I ascertain that Danny has forgiven you for your misdeed." At that moment, Tucker's right hand began glowing with intense white light. The light turned into a sphere that floated above his palm, which expanded into the shape of a handheld device. When the light faded, Tucker's PDA was resting in his hand.

"My baby…" the boy murmured. Danny had been holding this the evening that I died; I'd asked him to hold it for safekeeping and he told me that we were best friends and that he'd do anything for me, even if it meant guarding my precious baby…" Paul grinned.

"Your friend Daniel willingly took upon the burden of guarding that which is most precious to you…"

"No." The boy replied, and Paul was taken aback. "My PDA is important to me, but my friendship with Danny is even more important." He held the handheld at arms length and gestured that he was threatening to drop it. "Danny is too good of a friend for me to put technology ahead of him."

"You have truly become pious, Tucker. It would be my honor to escort you to Heaven." The Pearly Gates slowly opened and St. Paul spread his wings and floated through them. Tucker spread his own wings, kissed his PDA for good luck and stowed the device away in his cargo pants, and followed the angel into eternal bliss.


	6. Adoption

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Vlad sighed as his limo pulled up to the adoption agency. After twenty years of being so utterly alone, he decided that it was time to finally have someone to fill his castle with. And not someone who would constantly be fighting him, like Daniel. Of course he still longed after Maddie, but with each passing day Daniel was becoming more powerful and through him, Maddie was slowly drifting out of his grasp.

_After twenty years the things that I've desired more than anything are falling through my grasp…I never really got control over intangibility, in a sense…I can reach through walls but can't keep a solid grip on the things that are important to me…_

As he entered the building one of the workers told him that they had just gotten a pair of twins, the two of whom were nearly inseparable. She asked him if he wouldn't mind finding room in his heart for two loves.

Vlad smiled, but it wasn't an evil, gloating smile. It was the smile of one who was at peace with the world.

"Of course I don't mind a pair of twins," he replied.

Maddie and Packers. His two loves. Two lucky kittens that he carried by the scruffs of their necks back into his limo, and that would find a home in a spacious castle in Wisconsin.


	7. The Bag Ghost

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Danny was flying home after a particularly long day of school and agonizingly long afternoon spent chasing the Box Ghost halfway around Amity Park when, all of a sudden, a plastic grocery bag drifted in his path and landed right on his head. The halfa stopped in mid-air as he tried to remove the bag, but it seemed to be stuck. Tired and not in the mood to deal with an annoying bag, he simply blasted the top with an ectoblast and tore it off. As soon as the bag came off of his head, his ghost sense went off. Danny groaned and swung his head left, then right in an attempt to locate the ghost. He turned his attention forward and jumped back in surprise when he saw that the ghost was floating right in front of him.

"I am the Bag Ghost!" she exclaimed. She was blue, and wearing baggy jeans and a plaid shirt. She basically looked like some sort of cashier. "I control bags of all shapes and sizes. Paper or plastic?"

"Excuse me?" The halfa gawked at her, confused. She sighed and held out two bags, one paper and one plastic.

"Paper or plastic?" she repeated. Danny cocked an eyebrow and sucked her into the thermos without bothering with a retort.

The Box Ghost was sitting in the thermos, bored out of his little boxy mind, when suddenly a hole opened up in the device just above his head. He assumed that it was time for him to get out into the Ghost Zone but instead was greeted by a flash of blue light and some unexpected company. The ghost of what appeared to be a cashier soon joined him inside of the cramped ghost entrapment device. They blushed at the close contact.

"Hi," they both said in sync, and blushed even more deeply.

"I am the Box Ghost, master of all things corrugated and square!" he introduced himself.

"Wow, small world. I am the Bag Ghost, mistress of all things baglike and…uh…baglike!" she replied. He gasped.

"I have always wanted to meet one who manipulates bags! I find the way they float freely in the breeze so…beautiful," she gave a shy grin.

"And I've always admired boxes. The way some can be light and flexible, but others are strong and nearly impenetrable. They're so…rugged." He grinned back at her.

"At last! Someone who understands the true power of boxes!"

"And one who can see the subtle beauty of bags," She squirmed over as best she could so that her forehead was pressed against his, and kissed the end of his nose.

"I think this is the start of a promising relationship."


	8. Convertible

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Seeing as it was late April of their senior year of high school, Danny, Sam, and Tucker had study halls almost all day and were therefore bored out of their minds. So far they'd managed to keep themselves occupied by playing hangman, tic tac toe, the dot game, and others like that but by the last period of the day they were too lazy to even bother with those. The three of them were just slouching on comfy chairs in the student lounge and spacing out. Suddenly, Sam snapped out of her reverie.

"Oh, before I forget, do you guys want a ride home today?" Danny looked at her oddly.

"Uh, Sam? I usually fly home."

"Key wordusually. Today I brought my dad's BMW." Tucker sat up in his seat.

"The convertible?"

"That's the one."

"Awesome, Sam. Sure, a ride home in that would be great!" Danny exclaimed. The bell rang about a minute later.

"C'mon, let's go!" Sam led the boys over to the black sports car and they hopped in. She revved up the motor and Danny chuckled.

"I'm going home in a convertible! Woo-hoo!"


	9. Breakfast

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Danny was holding his as-of-yet uneaten breakfast as he and Tucker made their way to school. As usual, Tucker was simultaneously playing on his PDA and trying to get Danny to not be so darn stubborn and admit his feelings for Sam.

"C'mon Danny, you know she feels the same way about you."

"No, I don't."

"Danny…"

"Tucker, I'm telling you, I'm just not ready to admit it until I'm absolutely sure that she feels the same way! I just don't want to take the risk until I'm positive!" Sam caught up to them at that moment; they had been a ways ahead of her so she'd had to jog to catch them.

"What's that?" She huffed as she tried to get into the conversation. Danny frantically searched around for a topic to distract her and his eyes alighted on his breakfast.

"This?" he asked as he held it up. "This is a muffin."

* * *

So this morning before school started, my friend said that in a conversation and it inspired me to write this, so I sat down next to my locker, took out a piece of paper and a pen, and wrote it there and then. You probably didn't need to know that, but I felt like saying it, okay?

Also, I decided that I'm not going to update this after every single time I churn out a drabble because there's really no point in getting all of you so excited over a new chapter just to have you be disappointed over a tiny 100-word schnip. (Schnip is the word the editors at my school's newspaper use to refer to a tiny, 2-paragraph article). So, I'll write three or four chapters and update them as a group.

And finally, I'm still waiting to see a preview for School's Out, Ghoul's Out, but again, you probably don't care. So, I won't bother you any more. See you next update!


	10. Clockwork

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

The Master of Time floated in front of a mirror in his tower while in his young man form.

"I'm not a bad-looking ghost…" he mused. He sighed and removed his purple hood. "It's just this hair, though…" He ran a hand through the rainbow-colored afro and sighed again.

One of the observants materialized behind him.

"Clockwork, we need-" he noticed the ghost's hair and sniggered. Clockwork turned around to face him.

"If you tell anyone," he warned in his most threatening voice. The observant put his hands up palms-out in a gesture of peace.

"Alright, alright, I won't tell." The observant guffawed and disappeared. Clockwork sighed once again and put his hood back on with some difficulty.

"I could get Jazzmine to notice me if it wasn't for this hair…"


	11. Catfight

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Danny Fenton and Sam Manson, Casper High's most famous new couple, walked into school one morning hand in hand. As soon as they entered the building, Paulina stalked over to them.

"You'd better watch your girlfriend more closely, Fenton. I saw her kissing Phantom the other day, so you'd better stop her from cheating on _my_ boyfriend."

"Excuse me?" Sam interrupted. "Since when is Phantom your boyfriend?" the popular girl sneered.

"Even though Phantom's never responded to my advances, I'm still more popular and so if anything, he's mine, _mujerzuela_." She began walking away, but then Sam grabbed the back of her tight pink t-shirt.

"What did you call me?" She punched the other girl in the mouth.

"Oh, so you understand Spanish, then? Good." Paulina wiped a trickle of blood from her lip and tried to swipe at Sam with her perfectly manicured fingernails. Sam raised her hands and partially turned away from the attack, so Paulina ended up tearing the shoulder of her black tank top, revealing the strap of her black bra. Sam fingered the torn top openmouthed. Danny felt his blood jump.

"You think just because you're a Goth you can fight so well?" Paulina asked.

"I don't think, Paulina." Sam punched her in the right eye. "I know."

"Augh!" Paulina screamed and tackled Sam. She landed on top of the Goth and scratched at the forearms that were blocking Sam's face. Sam rolled around so that she was straddling Paulina and punched her once, then a second time, then a third. Paulina flailed around and unintentionally tore part of Sam's skirt and one of her stockings, revealing the girl's pale leg. Sam retaliated by grabbing a handful of Paulina's shirt and pulling. A piece of material extending from her left breast to her shoulder came off.

_Man, that's hot,_ Danny thought to himself as he watched the two go at it. He wasn't the only one watching, as the majority of the school had formed a semicircle around the girls, keeping them locked between a solid wall of people and a row of lockers.

Paulina punched Sam in the gut, causing her to sink to her knees. She pulled Sam up by the hair and slammed her headfirst into a closed locker. A thin trickle of blood appeared next to Sam's right eye. The Goth spun around, pinned Paulina's arm behind her back, and rammed _her_ into a locker. Sam pulled Paulina back, and shoved her forward a second time. This time around, the popular girl fell to the ground and didn't get up.

Sam looked up from the body of the unconscious cheerleader and realized that their little brouhaha had attracted the majority of Casper High's student body. She heard whispers that Lancer was on his way and that when he got there, he'd suspend both girls. Danny broke through the crowd, grabbed Sam by the arm, and led her out of the building. They turned a corner and he faced her, her back pressed against a building.

"I'm sorry, Danny, I shouldn't have let her get to me-" she didn't get the chance to finish her sentence as he pressed his lips against her own. They broke apart about a minute later.

"Do you have any idea how sexy that was?" He whispered into her ear in a husky voice. The warm air sent tingling sensations down her spine.

"I'll try and fight that bitch more often. Since you liked it so much." She grabbed the back of his messy hair and pulled him into another kiss.


	12. Crown of Fire

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Vlad was exploring the remains of Pariah's Keep. He wandered into the main throne room where Danny had fought the final battle against the Ghost King, nearly dying in the process. It was lucky that Vlad had been there, otherwise he'd never have been able to acquire the Fenton's Ecto-Skeleton.

_Hmm…What's this?_ He asked himself as he spotted something on the ground. _No, it couldn't be…_

But it was. The Crown of Fire. _Daniel must have knocked it off of Pariah's head during the battle, and nobody thought to pick it up._ Plasmius placed the crown on top of his head and it floated just over the white stripe in-between the horn-shaped black hair. The evil halfa summoned a mirror shield and inspected himself with the new addition to his costume.

_Not bad…_ he thought. _Not bad at all_.


	13. School Bus

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

The big, yellow school bus made its way down Specter Street on its way to Casper High. The bus's route dictated that it would pick up all of the students, stop at the high school, then continue on to the local middle school before returning to the station. That meant a torturous existence of listening to whiny middle-schoolers for those high-schoolers doomed to ride the bus to school every morning. 

A disgruntled Tucker Foley got off the bus and strode towards his best friends Danny Fenton and Sam Manson. Sam was close enough to school that she could walk, and Danny just flew every morning. But nooo, he had to spend twenty minutesout of every morning listening to high-pitched chattering.

"I swear," he grumbled as he headed over to them, "every time I take the bus, a little piece of me dies."

"What was it this time?" Danny asked with a small chuckle; Tucker's anti-bus rants were a common enough occurrence among the trio that they didn't even come as a surprise anymore.

"Today, everyone thought it would be funny to prank call Z100." Sam and Danny snickered.

"Wait, it gets better. Furthermore, they thought it would be funnier if they prank called Z100 in a foreign accent." The other two started cracking up as Tucker imitated Gregor calling into the station.

"Man, I can't wait until I can drive myself…" Tucker said more to himself than anyone else.

"I could always fly you," Danny offered.

"It's okay, man. I know you don't mean it like that, but I just can't arrive at school being held by another guy, if you know what I mean." Danny shrugged and opened his locker just as the warning bell rang.

* * *

For those who don't live in the Tri-State Area, Z100 is a popular radio station by me. My friend, the same one who made the muffin line from a few chapters ago, said that about riding the bus this morning. I found that line so hilarious that I was inspired to write this. Hmm...maybe I should tell him that his random outbursts inspire me to write drabble...

So anyway, this girl in my grade co-founded the 4-hand club, which is basically when two people sit at a piano and play a duet. The club had their recital today, and she had told everyone in the club to wear black and white. When she came to school this morning, she was wearing a black top with a small white shirt over it, and white pants. The first thing I thought when I saw her was _Oh skeet, she's wearing the same colors as Danny's costume!_ But then in biology, I had an epiphany. _Oh, double skeet, her outfit actually looks almost identical to Gregor's outfit from DCMH, except in girl form._ I never said any of this out loud, but yeah, that's my DP-in-real-life moment for today.


	14. Song Writer

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

The ghostly author sat in the corner of his cell, his head in his hands. The crisscrossed shadows cast by the dirty fluorescent lights in the hallway of the prison releasing a weak green light that partially succeeded at filtering through the cell door shifted as said cell door slid open. The burly guard grabbed the prisoner by his red scarf and hoisted him up.

"Wha-what's going on here? Why do you assault me and make me quake with fear?"

"Shut it, rhyme-boy. Someone's bailing you out."

"Paying $20,000 to set me free? Who on earth cares so for little old me?"

"Her." The guard thrust Ghost Writer down in a chair located in Walker's office. The shabbily-dressed ghost looked up and saw the white-clad ghost handing a document over to another figure. The second person signed the document and turned to face the prisoner she'd just freed, but the prisoner in question simply couldn't believe that _she_, of all people, would be helping him.

"You freed me, Ember McLain? Why thank you," he turned to the guard, "could you unshackle this chain?" he gestured to the large manacle binding him to the chair. The guard sighed, closed his eyes and counted to ten, and unlocked the chain. This particular guard had serious rhyming issues.

"But why pay for my freedom, pray tell? It's not like I have a gift or talent to sell," Ghost Writer inquired of his fiery blue-haired, guitar-toting liberator.

"Yeah you do. I bailed you out because you have an affinity for writing, especially poetry. I'm in need of some new songs, and I was hoping that you'd be able to help me out."

"You did free me, this is true…" he paused to think for a second, then flashed the pop diva a crooked smile. "I'd be glad to be the one who writes songs for you."

"Good." Ember flashed the Ghost Writer a smile of her own. "Let's go." She led him out of the prison.

* * *

When I first had this idea, it was supposed to end up as Ghost WriterxEmber. But then I thought about it for a second, shuddered, and said "eew." So I left it here. 


	15. Valerie

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

It was becoming almost like a daily ritual for the hunter and her prey. A ghost shows up, he arrives to fight the ghost, she arrives to fight him, they engage in a short dogfight, and he eventually runs away. This time, they met after he had taken out a weaker ghost, a green ghost hawk.

"I'm gonna get you this time, Phantom!"

"Why? Why are you always out to destroy me?" She looked at him as though he'd grown a second head. The fact that he could have if he'd wanted to is irrelevant.

"Because you ruined my life, that's why!"

"Did I, Valerie? Did I really?"

"What? You cost my father his job! We had to sell everything we owned and move to a shadier part of town just to keep a roof over our heads! I had to leave the rich, popular clique and get not one, but _two_ jobs! Yes, you did ruin my life." Danny shrugged.

"Okay, I'll admit that I'm sorry about your dad getting fired. And you having to move and get two jobs. But think about it-did you really lose anything by being kicked out of the popular clique?" She trained the laser aim on her ecto-grenade launcher between his luminescent green eyes.

"You have two minutes. Talk."

"Yeah, so you got kicked out of Paulina's little circle of cronies. But was that really so bad? You learned that they're all shallow and showy and lack any sort of substance. You got a job as Nasty Ned and learned the value of hard work. You started hanging out with unpopular kids and made some friends who like you for who you are, not for the $567 dollar top you bought with your dad's money. You even went out with Danny Fenton for a couple of days. And when you get right down to it, is being in the presence of a stud like Fenton such a bad thing?" Valerie paused for a minute to think, and lowered her gun.

"You've given me a lot to think about, ghost." She turned her jet sled around and powered it up, about to zoom away into the cloudless blue sky.

"I'll let you go this time, but don't think you won't see me again." The jets on her hoverboard roared to life and she disappeared in a red blur.

"Duh," Danny said to himself as he floated to the ground and transformed back into Danny Fenton behind a clump of bushes. "I'll see you at school."


	16. The Phantom

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

My silver hair, usually flopping down annoyingly over my green eyes, is blown back by my slipstream as I patrol the town. I scan the cars and people below me, a silent vigil whose black jumpsuit blends perfectly with the clear, starry night above and around me. They don't see me now, but when danger befalls them I'll come to protect them. To them, I simply appear out of nowhere, fight the ghost, and fade back into the night, like a phantom. Hence my name.

As I'm passing by the commercial district, I pause. A scream. A breath of blue mist. I follow the ghost sense to its source, and encounter a spectral bear about to tear apart a young couple. Punch. Kick. Crash as I'm thrown into a building. Recover. A flash of green as it tastes my ecto-blast. A blue vortex as I trap it in my thermos.

"Thank you, Inviso-Bill!" I wave back to them, grimacing at the dumb nickname, and take off into the night.

All in a day's work for the Phantom.


	17. Cooking

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

"Danny, wake up!" Jazz's shrill voice easily carried upstairs and caused the young raven-haired teen to awaken with a start.

"What could you possibly want, Jazz?" he mumbled to himself as he looked at the clock on his nightstand. "7:30? On a Saturday morning? Why, I ask you?" He slowly got out of bed and shuffled downstairs and into the kitchen, where Jazz was sitting at the table.

"I need you to make me breakfast, Danny." Danny groaned. He was the only one in his family that could make a decent breakfast without causing it to either come alive or explode, an ability that left him with the task of making everyone else breakfast on weekends. His parents woke up late, so it wasn't such a big deal. But his sister, ever the morning person…

"What do you want to eat?" He asked as he shuffled over to the refrigerator.

"Could you make an egg Mcmuffin?"

"How on earth do you make an egg Mcmuffin?"

"Easy-just cook an egg sunny-side up, put a piece of cheese on top of the cooked egg, and scoop the whole thing out onto an English muffin." Danny sighed as he got an egg, a piece of cheese, and an English muffin out of the fridge.

"And can you make two of them? I'm really hungry this morning." Danny grudgingly got a second set of ingredients and went over to the stove. He took a pan out of one of the cabinets and set it over the stove, and turned it on.

"It has to be set really low," Jazz reminded him. He turned the dial as low as possible without turning the stove off. He made to crack the eggs on the edge of the pan. That was where he went wrong.

"Danny, no!"

"What is it this time?"

"You can't crack the eggs on the edge of the pan! You have to take a knife and use it to break the eggs, that's how all the chefs do it!" Danny's left eye twitched as he followed his sister's instructions. Jazz put the muffins in the Fenton Toaster while Danny watched the eggs. After a few minutes, he flipped the eggs and placed a piece of cheese on each of them. He heard a timer go off and took the muffins out of the toaster, cut them in half, and placed an egg on two of the halves. He covered the eggs with a second half of muffin, and brought the whole thing over to Jazz. She took a bite.

"These are excellent! When you become an astronaut, you could totally be the ship's cook!" Danny smiled slightly at the compliment, but shook his head sadly.

"Jazz, astronauts eat out of prepackaged meals, and that's messy as it is in the absence of gravity. Imagine trying to cook when everything's floating everywhere." Jazz shrugged.

"You're a smart kid, Danny. You'd find a way." Danny chuckled, put the pan into the sink, and went upstairs and back to bed.

* * *

Yeah, so my sister loves eating eggs on the weekend for breakfast. The problem? She's not allowed to cook because a few weeks ago she forgot to put on butter or pam or something and wrecked one of our pans. So, who do you think gets stuck with the job of cooking her breakfast? That's right, yours truly. And the worst part is when my sister is feeling prissy she acts just like Jazz! Torture, I tell you. 


	18. We're Doomed!

If this story looks familiar to you, that's because it is.When I had originally written this, it was supposed to just be drabble. However, it got too long so I decided to publish it as a distinct one-shot. Unfortunately, it wasn't getting any reviews, so I changed my mind a second time and removed the one-shot and posted it as the next drabble chapter. This way, those of you who have me on your alerts _have_ to read it, whether you want to or not! BWAHAHAHAHAHA!

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Danny, Tucker, and Sam were sitting through English class one morning when Danny's ghost sense went off. Before he had time to excuse himself and run out of the room to transform, the ghost decided to come to him, rather than the other way around.

"It is I, Technus!" the Ghost Master of All Things Mechanical and Beeping shouted as he phased upward through the floor of the classroom.

"Technus? You look…oddly familiar," Danny noted. It was true; Technus was covered in gadgetry to the degree that only his head was showing. The rest of the battle suit looked like a giant spider, what with its eight legs and monstrous abdomen.

"Correct, child! I, Technus, have reconstructed my disguise from when we did battle inside of a video game. And that's not the only element of the game that I've brought to life!" He snapped and three samurai appeared in front of him.

"Xao-lin Moo-shoo warlords!" Tucker exclaimed.

"Yes! And I, Technus, have yet another surprise! For you see, I've figured out a way to bring elements of the game hidden within all of _you_ to the surface!" He held his robotic hands up and summoned a cloud of green cyber energy that descended onto the classroom. Several students, Mr. Lancer, and the three members of the trio began writhing as they started to change. Armor plating grew out from underneath their skin as they transformed into their game characters.

"And why would you enhance all of _our_ power?" Danny asked, now covered in blue armor with the letter D in a circle on his chest.

"To have you do battle, of course. And the winner will have the opportunity to face my champion. If the winner can defeat her then I will change all of you back. But if you lose, I get to keep all of you as my mechanical soldiers!"

"Champion?" Tucker asked, "What champion?"

"I have an idea," Danny replied ominously, "and its not gonna be good."

"Ahh!" Sam, now Chaos, suddenly put her hands to her head and sank to her knees. She stopped and stood back up, but this time her eyes weren't red, but black and rectangular.

"That's right, children. The greatest player in the game is now under my control. And whoever wins the skill contest gets the honor of facing her!" Technus disappeared with his signature cackle.

"Wait a minute," Dash interrupted. He was covered from head to toe in red armor and had the symbol of a fist engraved on his chest. "Fenton, your girlfriend is Chaos? So all of us got our butts handed to us by a _girl_? Not cool, man."

Before Danny had time to reply "she's not my girlfriend," all of the people who had been changed by Technus' cloud disappeared in a cloud of binary. They reappeared in a glowing green Romanesque coliseum with Technus and Chaos standing on a column at the far end.

"How are we gonna get out of this one?" A blonde boy wearing green armor named Andrew wailed. "Even after we have to thrash each other-"

"There's no way we can beat Chaos!" his identical twin, Josh, finished.

"What's the matter with all of you?" Lancer asked as he hefted a pink gun that matched his armor. "If we can beat this game, we shouldn't have a problem beating this mechanized menace. At least, _I_ can beat the game. I don't know about any of you." All of his students looked at him and sweat-dropped. "What is it?"

"You play Doomed, Mr. Lancer?" Danny asked, as his classmates began laughing. Lancer blushed.

"Well," the out-of-shape teacher quipped, "it doesn't take all that much time to fail all of your papers, so I kind of have a lot of spare time." That shut them up. Suddenly, as if they were being propelled by a psychic force, they were all thrust back into a straight line at the end of the stadium. Danny and Dash were pushed forward so that they were in the center of the coliseum and facing each other.

"The first duel shall be between these two," Technus announced.

"You mean I get to wail on Fen-_toad_ in cyberspace? Sweet!" Dash exclaimed as he fired a blue energy blast out of his palm. Danny turned intangible and phased down into the ground. "Hey, what gives?" Dash whined.

_Since its all a game, I'll be able to use my powers without anyone getting suspicious,_ Danny thought as he emerged, his hair white and his eyes green.

"It's a power-up I learned a while ago, Dash," Danny stated as he rose into the air. "And with it, you don't stand a chance!" Dash tried shooting blue blasts at Danny, but the smaller boy just went intangible and fired a blast of his own, this one green. The ectoblast hit home and Dash was sent flying. He disappeared in a cloud of pink pixels before he could hit the ground.

"Where'd he go?" Danny angrily inquired of Technus.

"All defeated foes are returned to the classroom unharmed," was the reply. Danny was telekinetically shoved back to the sidelines as Tucker and Lancer were thrust forward into the center arena.

"Well, I don't want to have to do this but if it's in the name of protecting everyone from this malevolent spirit, I guess I'll have to fight. That's my story and I'm sticking to it," Lancer said as he fired a pink energy blast from his handgun.

"This is for giving me a C- on that term paper last semester!" Tucker shouted as he dodged and fired a blue blast at his teacher.

"Oh really? Well, this is for sending that spitball my way last week!" Lancer yelled back as he jumped to avoid and sent a barrage of pink blasts at his student.

"Wait, I thought you gave me detention for that," Tucker stated, then yelped as he had to sidestep left then right, then duck and jump out of the way of the blasts. He returned fire by casting three discs that moved along the ground and exploded all around Lancer.

"Taming the Shrew," Lancer cried as he disappeared in a manner similar to Dash.

"The final first-round match will be between Josh and Andrew," Technus stated as the twins were cast into the center arena. The battle between the twins was close, as both of them had the same fighting style.

"Take this!" Josh cried as he placed both hands together and fired a large blue blast out of both of them.

"Right back at you, bro," his twin replied as he did the same exact thing. The blue blasts collided and each twin concentrated as they tried to achieve supremacy. The point of impact shifted left, then right as each of them battled for superiority.

"I don't have time for this," Technus complained. "Chaos, would you do the honors?" Sam jumped down from the column and landed hard on the ground. Her landing caused shockwaves to emanate from her feet. Josh and Andrew both fell over and were eliminated as the shockwaves reached them. Danny and Tucker both had the presence of mind to jump, so they weren't affected.

"Instead of pitting the two of you against each other, I've decided to speed things up by having both of you fight my champion at the same time!" Technus shouted from atop the column as Sam began approaching them menacingly.

"Sam? It's us, Tucker and Danny! Your two best friends! You don't want to waste us, do you?" Tucker beseeched her. Chaos' purple face remained expressionless as she threw a grenade at the two of them. Danny grabbed Tucker and made the two of them intangible so that the explosion passed through them. The two friends took to the skies, and Sam soon followed them.

A vicious dogfight ensued, with Sam chasing Danny and Tucker and shooting purple energy beams at them.

"Hey, Tucker!" Danny called over to his friend.

"Yeah?"

"How about a game of chicken?"

"It's like you're reading my mind, dude!" Tucker replied as they split off and each headed to opposite ends of the stadium. Chaos floated in the middle right in-between them and used twin handguns to attempt to shoot at them. Fortunately for them, the distance between her and them was so great that they had plenty of time to dodge. Danny and Tucker paused once they reached the ends of the stadium, then zoomed back towards the center as fast as they could go, firing blue and green beams at Sam all the while. As the two of them passed each other on either side of Sam, time seemed to stand still. Tucker reached into the confines of his yellow armor and pulled out a pair of discs and threw them at Sam just as Danny fired a series of green blasts. The two attacks hit each other and exploded with Danny and Tucker just barely making it out in time. Sam got caught in the middle of the blast and fell to the ground, unconscious. Chaos landed flat on her back, hard, and closed her eyes. When she reopened them, they were no longer black and rectangular, but round and red. Her facial visor became static and turned into Sam's face.

"What's going on, guys?"

"Technus was pitting you against us," Danny informed her. "He was controlling you and making you fight Tucker and I. I guess the hit you took caused him to lose control over you."

"He WHAT? Nobody tells Sam Manson what to do! Leave him to me, guys." Sam's face turned back into Chaos' impassive one as the black warrior turned to face Technus. Danny and Tucker smirked to each other and listened to the beautiful music of punches making contact and Technus yelling in pain.

As soon as Sam was finished pummeling Technus, the three friends disappeared in clouds of pink pixels and returned to their classroom, where everyone else was waiting for them. They looked down and noticed that their armor had gone and they were back to normal.

"Well, I'm glad that's over," Tucker sighed as he sank down into his seat.

"Tell me about it," Danny replied. Sam shrugged.

"I don't know. It was kinda fun being Chaos."

"Yeah, because you're like, the best player in the entire game!" Dash interjected and Sam shrugged modestly.

"I never knew you had such game though, Lancer," Tucker informed the teacher.

"You'd be surprised what some of your teachers do with their spare time, Mr. Foley," was the reply.

"And you two," Danny exclaimed as he turned to the twins, "you were awesome! It sucked that Technus had pitted you against each other; you looked as though you make a great duo!"

"Thanks!" The two of them replied simultaneously.

"So, wanna get together at my place and actually play the game this afternoon?" Danny offered.

"Sure," Tucker and Sam chorused.

"We're in," Josh and Andrew answered in sync.

"Sorry, but I don't associate with losers," Dash quipped.

"Yes, I can't be seen fraternizing with students. You kids have fun, just don't be up all night," Lancer warned them. The bell rang just after that, and the five friends left the classroom.


	19. Spirits of the Departed

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Unfit for life they've passed on,

Unfit for death they remain on this earth.

With a draft of cold air they float alongside us,

Intangible, invisible, silent phantoms.

* * *

HA! Fear my awesome poetic powers! 


	20. Ghost Gas

Sorry about publishing that super-short, super-lame poem. To apologize, I've written a longish drabble that will hopefully have you on the floor laughing and in so doing make up for wasting your time last chapter.

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

"We're having chicken tonight, kids!" Maddie Fenton exclaimed as she handed plates full of poultry to the other three members of the family. After everyone was served, she placed a covered chrome tray in the center of the table.

"Great dinner but…what's that?" Jazz asked her.

"I've figured out a way to use ghost energy to enrich broccoli so that it has three times as many nutrients as the normal kind," she responded as she lifted the cover with a flourish, revealing glowing green branches of broccoli.

"Uh, mom, the food's glowing green," Danny noted. Jazz simply shrugged.

"At least it hasn't come alive. Way to go, mom!" She took a piece and Danny followed her example.

"Hey, this is pretty good," he commented as he at a second piece. And a third.

The next morning, Jazz and Danny were having cereal for breakfast.

_Pfft_

"Danny, say excuse me!" Jazz yelled to her brother, who was blushing profusely.

"S'cuse me," he mumbled. All of a sudden, an odd green gas began filling the room.

"Whoa…was that you, Danny?"

"I don't know," all of a sudden, Jack and Maddie ran upstairs from the lab holding a green and silver device that began beeping as soon as it came in contact with the gas.

"Spectral readouts are at level 7.0 out of 10," Jack reported.

_Pfft._

"Hehehe…excuse me…" Danny muttered. The machine started beeping faster.

"Whoa, it just went up to 8.5 out of 10," Jack noted.

"That doesn't make any sense, unless…Danny, how much of that broccoli did you eat last night?"

"I don't know, three or four pieces, maybe. Why?"

"You seem to have some sort of-" she paused and giggled slightly, "ghost gas."

"WHAT?"

"I'm afraid so, son. That ectoplasm-enhanced broccoli gave you spectral flatulence," Jack told him.

_Pfft_

The frequency of the beeping intensified, and then the device sparked and broke. The three older Fentons guffawed, and Danny sank down into his seat, his face as red as a tomato. Just then, the doorbell rang. Eager to get away from the table, Danny ran over to see who it was.

"Sam, Tucker, boy am I glad to see you two. Mom, Dad, I'm going to school now!" He shouted and practically ran out the door.

"Whoa, since when are you excited about going to school?" Sam quipped.

_Pfft._

"And since when do you _reek_?" Tucker asked, his hand covering his nose. Danny started blushing again.

"Well, you see, my mom kinda served this ghost-enhanced broccoli last night, and it kinda gave me…ghost gas." He muttered the last bit so softly that they couldn't her him.

"What was that?" Sam asked.

"GHOST GAS!" Danny shouted. Tucker and Sam tried to hold it in, but couldn't and instead broke down laughing.

"C'mon guys, stop it! It's bad enough that my family was laughing at me, but now I have to go to school like this. The least you could do is help me out by not laughing!"

_Pfft_

"S'cuse me…" Danny murmured as the trio became surrounded by the green gas. Sam and Tucker stopped laughing immediately, and instead gasped as they tried to breathe through the thick green fog. They ran outside of the cloud and took deep breaths. A smirk was on Danny's face as he exited the cloud.

"Well, it got you to stop laughing, didn't it?" He inquired of them. They glared at him as Casper High came into view. The three of them entered the building and were immediately cornered by Dash.

"Time for your daily wailing, Fen-_toenail_!" He said as he lifted Danny by the front of his shirt and threw him into his locker.

_Pfft._

"What the heck was that?" Dash exclaimed. A green gas floated through the slits at the top of the locker and began to fill the hallway.

"Augh! I can't breathe!" the bully screamed as he tried to run away.

_Pfft._

Dash's eyes began watering, and he fainted and fell next to the row of lockers. Students began screaming as the cloud reached them and it wasn't long before the entire hallway was clear of people.

"Great Gatsby! What the heck is wrong with you kids?" Mr. Lancer yelled as he poked his head out of the teachers' lounge, thereby making himself a prime target for the gas. His eyes started to water as he clapped a hand to his nose.

"Julius Caesar! That ghastly odor! It's disgusting!"

"Thanks for the upper, Mr. Lancer," Danny muttered from inside his locker. "On the plus side, everyone's deserted the hallway so I can just phase out of here." He did so just as Lancer pulled the fire alarm. He cleared the building along with everyone else. Once the entire student body was outside, Principal Ishiyama stood atop a podium to address the high schoolers.

"Do any of you have an idea as to what caused this awful gas?" She asked.

_Pfft._


	21. Why is Vladdie all alone?

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

One fine Sunday morning, Vlad Masters descended the large staircase that led from his quarters upstairs down to the lower level of his castle. He went into the kitchen for breakfast, and poured himself a bowl of Fruit Loops that Daniel had been so kind as to stock his cupboards with during the first day of his winter vacation there.

_It really was kind of Maddie to let Daniel spend his winter holiday with me this year,_ the man thought to himself as he left the kitchen and entered his study. He sat down on his desk and noticed something that hadn't been there before-a tape recorder. Vlad opened it and noticed that there was a tape inside. Curious, he placed the tape back in the recorder and pressed 'play.' There were a couple of seconds of silence, then Danny's voice suddenly came on:

"Why is Vladdie all alone?

No cat, no cat.

Why is Vladdie all alone?

Because he has no cat.

'Cause he has no cat,

'Cause he has no cat,

Why is Vladdie all alone?

Because he has no cat."

"DANIEL!" Vlad shouted, his face red as a tomato, before he morphed into Plasmius and began scouring his castle for the doomed younger halfa.


	22. Boxes

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Rob inhaled deeply as he pulled the UPS truck up to the office building. He loved working in New York City, where there were so many squares and rectangles. Each city block was a square. Different blocks contained different types of buildings, but all of the types contained more boxes than he could ever begin to count.

In the poorer districts of the city, people lived in squat apartment buildings. Each building was square, and contained several floors. The floor plans were all rectangular, and they divided the apartment buildings into square rooms.

In wealthier areas, people began living in high-rise apartment complexes. Although these were much taller than the other types of homes, they were still rectangular. They still had rectangular floors and square rooms.

But the business district, that was Rob's favorite. There were skyscrapers tens of stories high, the tallest rectangles known to man. Each one had hundreds of windows on each floor. That made for over a thousand square windows _in each building!_ Furthermore, these windows were usually divided into two, so that there were really twice as many quadrilaterals per building. And that was just the exterior. The floors were all divided into cubicles. Five hundred squares per floor, easy. In a ten-story building, that was five _thousand_ squares on the inside.

In case you hadn't noticed, Rob was deeply fascinated by boxes. He had been ever since his grandfather had given him one of those box-within-a-box gags when he was five years old. That's why, although he was one of the most brilliant math students at his high school and could easily have made a career teaching at a prestigious university, he chose to work for UPS. He wanted to work somewhere where he was surrounded by boxes all the time. If only his peers had been able to understand…

_Flashback:_

_A teenager glanced around the classroom and quickly judged its dimensions._

"_Thirty feet by twenty-five feet," he noted. "You could fit 37.2 regular-sized moving boxes in here."_

"_You did all that in your head?" a new student asked, amazed._

"_It's no big deal," Rob replied modestly._

"_How many extra-large crates?" One of Rob's friends asked him, already knowing how the boy would respond._

"_17.3," Rob answered immediately._

"_How are you so good with math?" The first student inquired._

"_I'm not," was the reply. "I'm just good with boxes."_

"_Boxes? But you have such a great talent! Why waste it on something stupid like boxes?" Rob's left eye twitched._

"_Don't underestimate the power of the box. One day you'll face the wrath of boxes, and then you won't think that they're so stupid. Beware." The first student simply snickered and turned back in his seat to face forward._

Rob got out of the truck and hefted the box that he was supposed to deliver to the manager, who lived on the top floor of the skyscraper. He entered the rectangular door, headed through the rectangular hallway, and entered the rectangular elevator. He easily calculated the volume of the elevator shaft as he ascended fifteen stories.

Rob exited the elevator and made his way down a row of square cubicles to the rectangular main corridor that led to the boss's office. Unfortunately for him, an intern carrying a stack of papers a good three feet high didn't see him coming and knocked into him. Rob got shunted to the side. Right through one of the many square windows lining the building.

As Rob fell, he took in all of the squares and rectangles that had made his childhood and adulthood so unique. And somewhat creepy. His last thought as he looked down at the pavement was, _I never really noticed how the sidewalk is cut into squares like that. Cool._

And then everything went black.

Rob awoke in a very strange place. Everything was green, and there were clouds of swirling mist everywhere. He looked down and noticed that he was still wearing his uniform, but oddly enough, his skin was now blue. It was a couple of seconds later that he realized that he was floating in mid-air.

"Hello, stranger," a strange creature called as it floated up to him. "Welcome to the Ghost Zone! What's your name?" Rob thought for a second. He noticed that, unlike his previous home, there wasn't a box in sight. Yeah, there were those eerie purple doors, but that didn't compare to the quadrillions of boxes he was used to. There and then, he took it upon himself to transform this 'Ghost Zone' and make it more like New York. More boxy.

"I…am the Box Ghost. Beware!"


	23. Fantasy

**Warning to those unfortunate souls who haven't seen Reality Trip yet: This drabble contains MAJOR spoilers, so don't read it until after you've seen RT!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Danny Phantom flew off into the distance to enjoy his summer vacation, leaving his two best friends in the world standing in front of his house. To get rained on by the remains of the Reality Gauntlet.

"OW!" Tucker exclaimed as a dirt clod hit him in the face.

"Get over it, it's just a piece of dirt," Sam chastised, right before a blue stone hit _her_ in the face.

"OW!" she exclaimed as she picked it up to examine it.

"Is that…is that karma I smell?" Tucker asked and did a victory dance. That is, until he noticed the gem that Sam was inspecting.

"Sam? Why are you holding the Gem of Fantasy?"

"Because, Tucker, that's what hit me on the head." The gem began glowing with blue energy that spread across her body.

"Sam! Drop the gem!" Tucker yelled to her, but it was too late. Sam became fully enclosed in the blue energy and disappeared.

When Sam woke up she was on her bed in her room. And Danny was on top of her. Kissing the life out of her.

"Sam…" he moaned before kissing her neck, jawline, and ear. Sam grinned from ear to ear, grabbed him by his hair, and pulled him into a long kiss. They broke apart after a couple of minutes.

"I can only think of one thing that would make this moment any better," Sam stated. The gem, which she was still holding, sparked again and Valerie popped into existence in the center of the room.

"Danny? Manson? But I thought…we were…" a single tear fell out of her eye and she disappeared on Sam's command. Sam sighed.

"I know I'm gonna regret this in about two seconds…" she mumbled, then pushed Danny off of her.

"Sam? What was that for?"

"The only reason we're doing this is because of _this_," she told him, and held up the Reality Gem for him to see. "Because this is was my fantasy. I love you, Danny, and want you to love me back more than anything in the world. But not if it means bending reality to manipulate you." She pulled a Fenton Thermos out from under her bed and made to drop the gem inside, but Danny caught her wrist.

"Sam, that gem's power only brought us here. It didn't make me want to make out with you. That part was _my _fantasy." Sam blinked as she looked up at him, a hopeful glimmer sparkling in her amethyst eyes.

"You…you mean it?"

"I mean it, Sam. I love you too. Always have. I'll admit that Paulina was hormones, but I was only pretending to like Valerie so that my heart wouldn't have to bleed just thinking about how you'd never love me back." He got back on top of her and caressed her face.

"So, blue's our color then?" he asked.

"Blue's our color," she replied as they came together for another kiss.

* * *

In case you didn't get it, blue is their color because the Gem of Fantasy is blue. Just clarifying that.

Since all of you have heeded my advice and have therefore already seen RT, I'm going to spend the rest of this author's note yammering about it. Ready?

HOW SICK WAS THAT! IT WAS SOOO INCREDIBLE! THE PART WHERE...AND THEN WHEN HE...AND THEY...AND, YEAH, IN GENERAL, OUT OF THE THREE DP MOVIES, THAT ONE IS DEFINITELY IN THE TOP 3! NO DOUBT!

(coughs) yeah, that was my emotional outburst for today. Anyway, review and tell me what your favorite lines were. I don't remember the exact words for mine, but it was after they captured the yellow gem and the Gothapalooza went back to being...well...Goth, and the teddy bears hugging Sam turn into two other Goths and she says something like, "Ah, I love the smell of civil disobedience in the evening," or something like that. Again, I don't know the exact wording, but it's still my favorite line.

For those unfortunate souls who haven't seen the movie yet and I just wrecked it for you, I say: "I'm really really really really really sorry for wrecking it for you, but you still should have heeded my advice at the top of this chapter! Again, sorry! Please don't tear me apart molecule by molecule! PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASEPLEASE!


	24. Ghost Sense

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

"I need that outfit back by Monday. And don't get any of your Goth sweat on it, either."

"We don't sweat, we simmer!"

* * *

Paulina sat in the back of the classroom, as usual. Why bother sitting up front with the geeks? It's not as though she actually needed to learn anything. She was perfect, pretty, Paulina. No guy could resist her, and her _papa_ said that she was the most beautiful princess on the planet. And nobody disagreed with her _papa_.

She looked up from her nails every once in a while, just to make it look like she was paying attention. For some reason, Mr. Lancer just couldn't quite realize that she was above useless things such as English class, but it was easier to just pretend to care than to fight him. Fighting might cause her to get aggravated, and aggravation brings on early wrinkles. And Paulina was nothing without her flawless skin.

This time, after she finished her cursory glance at the blackboard, she flicked her gaze around the room to look at the rest of her class. As her eyes passed over Fenton, she noticed something odd. All of a sudden, he breathed out blue mist. As soon as that happened, he started shivering and asked Mr. Lancer if he could go to the bathroom. Lancer allowed it, grudgingly, and Fenton practically ran out of the room. His loser friends shot each other serious glances, and Paulina just barely held back a chuckle at seeing him run out of the room as though his very life depended on it.

But then she remembered the blue mist. She had seen it once before, when she had been in that icky hospital. Paulina looked down at her notebook, which was full of sketches of Phantom. He was so cute, the way his costume stuck to his skin, and those to-die-for green eyes…she sighed as the notebook brought back memories.

_"What was that?" Paulina asked as she hiccupped and a bit of blue mist came out of her mouth._

"_It's called a ghost sense. It goes off whenever a ghost is nearby," the ghost kid explained, just before he breathed out some blue mist of his own._

"_Like you?" She asked in her most seductive voice._

"_Uh…yeah, like me," he replied, shyness apparent in his tone._

Paulina sighed once again as she admired her sketches. Suddenly, she sat straight up in her seat. Fenton could do this 'ghost sense' trick. Phantom could do the same thing. They sort of looked alike, except the hair color was reversed. They were about the same height, and had similar voices (Phantom had a ghostly echo), but all in all it was almost as though they were the same person. Almost.

"No, it couldn't be…" Paulina mumbled to herself as she started a new sketch.


	25. Final

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

"Okay class, do any of you have anymore questions on the review packet?" nobody raised their hands. The previous week, Lancer had given them a packet containing forty-two questions, several of which would be taken out and comprise that class's final exam. Over the weekend, everyone had typed up bulleted answers and brought the answers to class that Monday. They had just finished going over the packet, and the exam was the next day.

"Good!" Lancer exclaimed, upon seeing that everyone's questions had been answered. "Now, since Principal Ishiyama has refused to allow you to use the school's computers for the exam, and I don't want all of you to take the time to both figure out answers and write them out by hand, I'm passing out these little note cards. Each of you choose questions from the packet whose point values add up to 100 Then, hand the cards back to me. The questions you choose are the ones that you have to answer on the exam." The room was silent for a second.

"Are you serious?" Dash asked, disbelief apparent on his face.

"Quite serious, Mr. Baxter," Lancer replied as he handed out the note cards. The students all looked at their cards as though they were godsends.

"So…we only have to study, like, seven questions instead of forty-two?" Tucker asked incredulously.

"Wow…Mr. Lancer rocks!" Danny exclaimed. Sam and Tucker gaped at him, their eyes the size of dinner plates.

"Danny? You're scaring us. And we fight ghosts on a daily basis," Sam told him.

"Yeah, dude, you thinking positively about Lancer is a sign of the apocalypse," Tucker added.

"I don't care," Danny replied, "I love this class!" He eagerly put down the questions that he'd selected and handed the card to Lancer.

"Toooo much caffeine this morning," Sam quipped as she and Tucker followed suit.


	26. Superlancer

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

"Remind me why I'm here again?" Danny asked dejectedly as he sat in a chair directly across from Lancer one afternoon after school had ended.

"Because, Mr. Fenton, your grades are continuing to slide and I want to know _why_." Danny gulped nervously; he couldn't tell Mr. Lancer that he never had time to study because his time was spent protecting the town from ghosts, and he couldn't think up a lie complicated yet plausible enough to make the overweight teacher buy it.

"I…uh…well, I…" Danny meandered incoherently for a bit as he scanned the room for anything that could change the topic. His eyes alighted on a picture of Lancer's head superimposed on a picture of Superman. He began cracking up.

"I'm sorry…" he squeaked out in-between fits of laughter, "but that just made my day…"

"Mr. Fenton, what in the name of William Shakespeare are you talking about?" Danny pointed to the picture and Lancer turned a deep shade of puce.

"That was on a cake that the sophomores gave me on Lancer Appreciation Day," the teacher mumbled. Aware that he wasn't about to make any headway with his student in the mood he was currently in, he had no choice but to dismiss him.

"Fine, Mr. Fenton, you can go, but expect to see me again if your grades continue to suffer." Danny left the room, still laughing.

"Superlancer," he said to himself, then fell down against a row of lockers, he was laughing so hard.


	27. Freakshow

**Disclaimer: Ido not own Danny Phantom! I own Freakshow's dad, though. That's wierd.**

* * *

"Come in here, Frederich," the man's wheezy voice emanated from inside the circus tent. Frederich, a tall, skinny, pale, bald teenager with a large, beaklike nose and red contact lenses solemnly entered the tent. He kneeled next to the bed, where his dying father lay.

"Father…" he murmered.

"Don't worry about me, son. Soon enough I'll become one of the ghosts that our family has worked with for countless generations…"

_If by 'worked with' he means 'controlled,' then yes, the Showenhower family has indeed 'worked with' ghosts for as long as I can remember,_ Frederich thought. He didn't voice his opinion aloud, however. He knew how highly his father and late mother regarded ghosts.

_They always paid attention to ghosts more than me. There were times when…I almost wish _I_ was a ghost…_

"And soon enough, the tool that we've used to do so will pass on to you," the old man continued as he gestured to the black scepter with the glowing red orb on its tip.

"For generations, the Showenhower family has used this scepter to control ghosts, and bring entertainment to the masses in the form of Circus Gothica. Now it's your turn." His weak frame was wracked with a coughing fit before he lay down on the slab of a bed.

"Use it wisely, my son…" he wheezed before drawing his last breath and falling silent.

Frederich took the staff and quietly left the room. He felt no love towards his father; both of his parents had neglected him for as long as he could remember; always doing something or other related to the circus that his family ran. When they weren't doing something circus-related, they were working with the ghosts that helped run the circus. Bitter and alone, he had become Goth, much like those who came to the circus for entertainment. He didn't feel emotions, and didn't feel any sorrow or remorse over the passing of his father. He turned to a big, bulky ghost who wore spiked bracelets around his wrists and neck.

"Take the body outside and bury it," Frederich ordered as he raised the staff up above his head. The ghost obeyed. Of course he would; he was controlled by the scepter. The ghost flew into the tent and exited holding Frederich's father's corpse. He turned intangible and placed the body deep into the ground. Frederich entered the big tent and crossed the rope circle that delineated the center ring.

"Freaks!" He called as he raised the scepter, _his_ scepter, to the heavens. "Center ring!" The four ghosts his family worked with all heard his call and heeded it. First came the big ghost, then a tiny dwarf ghost. Then, a ghost with crazy black hair wearing black leather descended from the high-wire. She melted into a puddle of goo upon landing, then stepped out of the puddle and made her way to the center. And lastly came Lydia. She was the first ghost to enter the service of the Showenhower family, and the most powerful. Furthermore, she was the only one whose service wasn't bound by the scepter; she worked for them by choice. With her hair in spikes, multiple piercings, and hundreds of tattoos that could come to life and obey her every command, she was a true freak that couldn't find a home anywhere else.

"As you may or may not have realized by now," Frederich began, "my father has passed away. As such, he has left the family heirloom, this scepter, under my care. I am your new master." He paused for a second. He had always hated his name. Frederich Isak Showenhower. Such an old-world name, one that recalled the Rhineland where his family had originated. And now he could reinvent himself, since the only people who had known him well enough to actually know his name were all dead. He decided to take elements from all three names and combine them to form one that was more fitting of his profession and attitude on life.

"And you are to call me Freakshow."


	28. Reality

First off, I want to thank Spirit and Soul 3 for reviewing so much. I honestly can't thank you enough for supporting me all this time. But just because I'm thanking you now, doesn't mean that this is the last chapter! I don't know how far I'm going to take this, it all depends on when and how often I get inspired to write something. I just wanted to take the opportunity to say thanks because, well, you really deserve it. 

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Clockwork was standing watch over time when suddenly his hand flew to his head and gripped it in an effort to relieve the humongous migraine that had just flared up. The Master of Time stumbled over to the viewing screen that allowed him to see events on the mortal plane as he wondered what on earth could possibly have brought on this major headache. Clockwork knew from experience that these killer pains only came up when there was a huge threat to the time stream; he hadn't had a headache this big since the Nasty Burger explosion. He winced as the screen activated with a flash of white light.

The Reality Gauntlet. Of course. Some nut gained the ability to manipulate reality itself. Clockwork couldn't think of a single artifact capable of doing so much damage so unintentionally. He groaned as the guy wearing a red suit jacket waved his hand and the day turned to night. The worst part was, he probably didn't know how many billions of people he just affected with that one sweep of his hand.

Totally ignoring the fact that he just screwed up the rotation of the earth itself relative to the sun, Freakshow might have unknowingly brought about chaos throughout the world. People such as farmers whose lives depended on the presence or absence of sunlight were thrown completely out of rhythm. Crops wouldn't grow correctly, and mass starvation could ensue. In developed areas, where people worked all day then outsourced their work across the globe so that it could be done at night as well, everything was backwards. The people who were supposed to be asleep now had to work all of a sudden, and the people who should have been working now were being told to go home. Shops and restaurants were all thrown out of whack because of the immediate change. And this was done all with one sweep of his hand.

_See, this is why the Reality Gauntlet should never have been created. It has way too much spectral power for any good to come of its use. And I always get a migraine whenever someone messes with reality._

Clockwork was about to intervene when he saw Danny fly onto the scene and attempt to stop a train containing everyone who was important to him from being destroyed. He watched as his young charge stood bravely in front of the train. Until Freakshow used the Gauntlet to turn him to Jell-O and make him splatter and have his pieces fall to the ground.

Clockwork sighed and turned back the boy's time for about five seconds, just long enough for him to coagulate back into a humanoid shape and turn back into his normal ghost form. He watched as Danny saved the day and used the Gauntlet to turn everything back to normal.

_I guess I won't have to intervene too much this time,_ Clockwork thought contentedly. _I should have known better in the first place; Danny would never have let his family and his best friend's family die. The Mansons, maybe, but I say that they have to survive; it'll make Danny's marriage to their daughter all the more interesting._


	29. Rules

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Rules. Every successful society needs them, and everybody in that society needs to follow them in order to retain order. Without them, there would be utter chaos.

What is a rule? A rule occurs when people come together to form a community and each of them give up certain privileges in order to stabilize society. The rule is formed when a certain privilege is forbidden. For example, it is human nature to get what one needs in any way possible, including stealing from others. However, a community simply cannot exist where everybody steals. Therefore, the members of the community communally give up the act of stealing in the name of self-advancement. In so doing, a rule is created-do not steal.

And what if someone breaks the rule? Chooses to ignore the laws of society in order to further themselves? If left unattended, they will eventually cause a breakdown of the entire societal structure. They break the rules and aren't punished, so everyone else thinks that they can get away with breaking the rules as well. The rules mean nothing, and society is in chaos. That's why those who break the rules must be punished. They must be isolated from society in order to protect society from being poisoned by them.

It makes perfect sense. The logic is flawless. So why can't everyone else see it as clearly as I do? The Lunch Lady understands the importance of rules; if you wreck the mess hall she'll come after you saying that you can't break the rules of lunch. And you'll listen to her. Of course, she'll also be wielding a ten-foot-tall chicken leg like a light-saber. But I digress.

The ghosts in my prison will listen to her, but they don't understand why they're there in the first place. It's so simple; they broke a rule, and if allowed to roam freely, the order in this realm will deteriorate. It's my job to make sure that that doesn't happen by removing those who break the rules.

There might be chaos everywhere else in this Ghost Zone, but there will be order in my prison.

The name's Walker. Know it. Fear it. Obey it.


	30. Schizo

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**_

* * *

_

_There are a million reasons why a guy would like you! You're smart, fun to be around, cool pretty-why am I still talking? I am such a spaz._

Danny groaned and mumbled something incoherent into his blanket as he lay facedown on the bed. Why did he have to let his guard down and say that, why? He'd been keeping his feelings for her a closely held secret since, like, seventh grade, so why did he have to slip up now?

_Because you know she likes you back, bonehead!_

"Who was that?" Danny asked as he stood up, only to realize that the voice was coming from inside his head.

_I'm your inner voice._

"Great, now I'm schizo, too.

_Yup! Isn't being crazy fun? Anyway, the reason I'm here is to tell you to go talk to Sam._

Are you nuts? She never wants to speak to me again!"

_Where the heck did you get an idea like that?_

"Are you kidding? She's probably still pissed about me spying on her and Gregor, and what with this afternoon's slip-up, she probably thinks that I was spying because I was jealous."

_And this would be untrue how?_

"Shut it…"

_I will if you go talk to her._

"Fine," Danny grumbled as he transformed.

_There's a good halfa. Now, don't forget to wipe the purple lipstick off of your face, neck and certain other unmentionables when you get back._

"Speak one more time and I'm mentally kicking myself."

_No! My voice already dropped once! I don't want to have to go through puberty again!_

"there's a good inner voice." Danny was grinning triumphantly as he phased through the ceiling of his room and started flying towards Sam's house.


	31. Vlad's Mom

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Vlad Masters was in the middle of working on yet another evil plot when a phone somewhere in the depths of his castle rang. Annoyed both at the fact that he was interrupted from his plotting and the fact that he couldn't find the damn phone, he was slightly pissed by the time he picked up, to say the least.

"Yes, what is it?" He angrily asked the unfortunate soul on the other end who had to deal with his wrath.

"Is that any way to greet your mother?" An old woman's voice shot right back. Vlad stepped back, surprised. It appeared that the 'unfortunate soul' status had switched sides.

"Uh…hey, mom…"

"Don't 'hey mom' me! I can't even remember the last time you called me, let alone sent a card or something. It took me _four hours_ of being transferred halfway around Dalv Corp to half a million different operators before I was given your home phone number. I should be six feet under before I can talk to my own son?"

"Mom, I-"

"Don't interrupt! Are you married yet? Didn't think so. Heaven knows I've been waiting far too long to get grandchildren. And what do you do? Sit in a house who-knows-where and don't even try to meet someone. I know a pretty girl who works at the grocery store downtown who'd just love to meet you and-"

"I'm not interested in meeting anyone new, mom."

"That's your problem! What happened to you, Vladdie? Back when you were in college it was 'Maddie this' and 'Maddie that.' You were head over heels for her! I know you can learn to like someone if you just go out and look, but you won't even do that! What am I supposed to do to get grandchildren? I know, I'm going to move in with you." Vlad stared at the receiver in horror as though it had turned into Jack Fenton's big, fat, idiotic head.

"Mom, you can't do that-"

"Oh yes I can. I'm coming over there and I won't leave until you get married! Oy, I haven't seen you in fifteen years. Fifteen years! What's a mother supposed to do, stalk her children?" She hung up and left the question open. Vlad groaned as he hung up the phone.

"My mother's coming to live with me…that's it. I'm officially a lonely guy in my forties that lives with his mom. I'm so getting a cat."

* * *

I had this idea while I was in the car this afternoon, and just _had_ to write it down. I realize that this could be a great multi-chaptered fic, but I just have a bunch of stuff on my plate just now so I don't really want to start a whole new multi-chapter. But if any of you want to continue this, you're more than welcome to. I can already see some hilarious scenarios involving Vlad andhis mom, like her discovering that he's half ghost, her discovering that he's evil, her meeting Danny...there are so many possibilities. But like I said before, you're all welcome to pursue this if you want. 


	32. Invisible

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

I crouch down in my hiding place, masked by the shadow the door casts on this part of the wall. In this moment, I lay here as invisible as Danny could ever hope to be.

"Tuck? Where are you, dude?"

Unseen by every soul on the planet save for myself, it's as though I don't even exist. In this moment, I am the very definition of a phantom.

"Come on, Tuck, quit hiding."

It won't be long before my act is discovered, my cloak of invisibility falling about my ankles. Too soon I'll be forced to exit the solitude of the realm of the unseen.

"Seriously, Tucker!"

I sigh. Time to end this ruse. Time to resign from my temporary existence as a phantom. I grin slightly as Danny enters his room and looks for me there. One last ghostly gag, before the title of Phantom returns to its rightful owner. I jump out from behind the door.

"BOO!"


	33. Bad Day

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

A very disgruntled Sam Manson stalked through the halls of Casper High one afternoon during lunch. She'd just arrived at school and was looking for some unfortunate souls on whom she could vent her spleen. She ran into Danny and Tucker in the library. Danny took one look at her facial expression and immediately hid behind a book. Tucker, unfortunately, misinterpreted the murderous gaze as a typical Goth scowl and acted as such.

"What's up, Sam?" He asked, right before he was cut off by a pale hand grasping his windpipe in an iron grip.

"Geez, Sam, just relax and tell us what happened," Danny said as he made Tucker intangible, thereby sparing him from an impending death-by-angry-Goth.

"What happened? WHAT HAPPENED? You want to know what happened?" Sam shouted as she sat down in a nearby seat with a huff. "Okay, first, I had to baby-sit my baby cousin. The brat is by far the most annoying thing on the planet. I swear I had to change more diapers than a day-care lady."

"Whoa…that sucks…" Danny commented.

"You think? And that's not even the worst of it! The _one_ day I try and do something nice for my mother by getting her a present from her birthday, the one day…I picked up a gift at the mall and dropped it off at home. While I was halfway to school, I realized that I'd left my book bag at home."

"Harsh…" Tucker noted. Sam took a deep breath, held it for ten seconds, and sat limply in her chair.

"I can always just fly you to your house so you can get your stuff," Danny offered.

"Really?"

"Sure! There's still fifteen minutes left of lunch; we'll be there and back with time to spare!"

"Wow, thanks, Danny!"

"Don't worry about it; it's no big deal, really." He ducked under the table and transformed in a flash of white light. As Phantom, he wrapped a white-gloved arm around her waist and flew the two of them to Sam's house. Sam picked up her purple spider-shaped bag and they returned to school. Danny transformed back to Fenton just as the bell rang.

"Thanks again, Danny," Sam chirped. She leaned up on her tiptoes, kissed him lightly on the cheek, and beaded off to class, leaving a very confused and blushing Danny behind.


	34. Exams

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

The last exam of the year for Casper High's freshman class was biology. Students were given a test designed to take two hours, and on the off-chance that they finished early, they weren't allowed to leave the examination room until the full two hours had elapsed. 

_Damn…now what am I supposed to do?_ Danny Fenton asked himself. He'd handed his test in before the first hour was even up, and was now bored senseless. Being the son of two brilliant scientists had its perks, one of which was a strong affinity for science. Danny looked around the room and watched as other students wrote their exams.

He saw Paulina and sighed happily. Danny watched as her silky black hair cascaded down and shielded her flawless skin…his eyes wandered down to her thong as it protruded from her tight blue pants. He mentally smacked himself and flicked his gaze back up. Looking at the way her pencil was moving, it didn't look as though she was filling answers into the scan-tron sheet. The sweeping motions indicated that she was…doodling? Danny shook his head slightly and turned to watch other students.

His eyes alighted on Dash. Danny smirked contentedly as the football star marked down an answer, worriedly erased it, chewed on his pencil, and marked something else down, only to repeat the process. Dash might be a formidable presence on the field or in the halls, but he was as weak and defenseless as the Box Ghost when it came to the world of academics.

Finally, his gaze rested on Sam, who was sitting next to him. He watched as she read a question, carefully analyzed it, and put down an answer. She'd probably score higher than him; his style was to run through the test and mark down the first answer that he thought made sense, a process that finished the test but usually resulted in multiple errors, some of them careless. She, on the other hand, always waited until she was certain an answer was right before marking it down, which took longer but was more accurate. She shot him a death glare as she reached a difficult question, and he smiled back apologetically. She turned back to her test, and amethyst eyes were once again shrouded by raven locks. Her skin was a ghostly pale compared to Paulina's tanned skin, so the difference her hair made as it covered her face was striking. Her lips, colored purple with Goth lipstick, were just barely visible under the curtain of hair. Danny marveled at their fullness, and felt himself drawn to them as she pursed them in concentration. He was filled with a strange desire to…taste them…feel their texture as they brushed against his own…

_No! This is Sam we're talking about! SAM! Your best friend since forever! You can't be thinking this way about her!_ His mind screamed, but he paid it no heed as he continued to stare at his best friend. She looked up and caught him staring at her.

_What?_ She mouthed. Startled, Danny started blushing slightly.

_Nothing,_ he mouthed back. She rolled her eyes and looked back down at her test.

_Whew….that was waaay to close for omfort,_ the halfa thought to himself.

_You shouldn't have been looking at her in the first place,_ his inner voice chastised.

_Maybe…but I can't help it…she's so pretty, and she actually has a personality, unlike Paulina,_ Danny responded.

_Whoa, listen to you! Calling your best friend pretty, then taking her side in the Paulina debate. What's gotten into you all of a sudden? It's almost as though you like Sam!_

_You know what? I think you're right,_ Danny replied. _I think I do like Sam._ He could hear a chorus of angels singing in the back of his mind. _So, now what do I do?_

_That, Fenton, is for you to figure out._ Danny was about to respond when the proctor stood up from her chair.

"Time's up!" she called.

* * *

Yeah, in case you hadn't realized, I wrote this during the second hour of my Bio final this morning. 


	35. Golf

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

"Well, I must say, this has been an interesting game, Mr. Fenton," Jeremy Manson noted. He and Danny stood on the eighteenth green of the golf course at the exclusive country club to which Mr. Manson had invited Danny for the day. They had determined beforehand that the winner of this game would be able to make one demand that the loser could not refuse. Danny had just finished putting and Mr. Manson was just barely ahead. If he were to make this putt, he would win by a stroke.

"You do realize that if I win, you'll never be allowed to see Samantha ever again, right?" He asked, a smug grin apparent on his features. He bent down and lined up his stroke, and brought the putter back.

"Before you do that, I should probably tell you that I've asked your daughter to marry me," Danny suddenly said. Upon hearing the news, Mr. Manson recoiled and as a result, his shot went way off to the left. He grumbled and made his way over to the ball.

_At least if I tie, neither of our demands are met and I don't have to adhere to his,_ Mr. Manson thought bitterly. He carefully scoped out the shot, and lined up with the utmost precision. He brought the putter back…

"And she said yes," Danny informed him. Mr. Manson gasped and his shot ended up falling far short of the hole. He cursed to himself as he putted one last time, this time sinking the shot.

"And," Danny continued, "since I beat you by a stroke, I get to have one demand fulfilled. And I demand your blessing for Sam and I." Jeremy had a murderous look on his face as he acquiesced.

* * *

Sorry it's been so long! I wrote this about a week ago but for some reason FF wasn't letting me upload it!

By the way, I've been meaning to ask this for a while now but I never got around to it: How many of you have ghost envy? I definitely do.


	36. EctoAcne

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!  
**

* * *

"Ow," Vlad groaned as Jack Fenton's fat fingers dug underneath his skin. The lab accident that had occurred a couple of weeks ago, that he could live with. But _this_? 

"Come on, V-man! When I was a kid my dad used to do this all the time to get rid of acne!" Jack exclaimed as he popped another one of the multiple spectral zits that dotted his roommate's face.

"Yes, it might _ow_ have worked _ow_ on regular acne, but _ow_ what about _ow_ ecto-_ow_-acne? It's a totally different _ow_ ailment!" He grimaced yet again while Jack tried to dig his fingernails below the pimples and draw the ectoplasm out.

"Yeah, Maddie and I thought about that, and she had another idea, but you might not like it…" Jack's voice trailed off as he looked down at the ground.

"What is it, J-man?"

"Well, you see, she kinda…"

"Jack, what _is_ it?"

"She signed you up to get a facial!" Jack blurted. Vlad sat straight up in his hospital bed and stared at Jack in shock as he used a towel to wipe up the green pus that was oozing out of the zits Jack had popped.

"She signed me up for a w_hat! _Am I a _woman_?" He exclaimed angrily.

"She says that guys get them all the time. Man, I feel sorry for you, Vladdie." Vlad groaned as he sank back down into the bed.

"I hate ecto-acne," he mumbled.

* * *

I'm never forgiving my mom for signing me up to get one of these. Never.  



	37. Confused

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

They were right. All of them. My parents, Valerie…all of them. I'm nothing special. Yeah, I'm the Halfa, but beyond that…I'm just a ghost. I'm evil, just like all the others. 

I found this out during a discussion with Vlad. Not the powerful, billionaire, fruitloop. Oh no, I mean a broken, impoverished Vlad who lived in a cave and had a beard that went down to his knees. He described to me the union of my ghost half and his to create the evil version of myself that I had fought hours before. He told me that when his ghost half fused with mine, his evil side overcame me…that's a lie. My ghost half was evil to begin with. If it wasn't, then it wouldn't have tried to separate Masters from Plasmius as soon as it became an independent being. Vlad described to me the look in his eyes right before he strapped on those Ghost Gauntlets…there was pure evil in those eyes, even before Plasmius came into the picture. I have evil in me. I am a ghost, just like any other ghost.

So why doesn't the evil within me overtake me? Why do I continue to be the hero? Why doesn't my ghost form, as soon as it's accessed, immediately begin destroying the town?

I suppose there's that little detail I overlooked earlier in this soliloquy-I'm the Halfa. In addition to being a ghost, I'm also human. My ghost half is tempered by human emotions such as love and happiness.

So if that's the case, what am I? A ghost trying to fit in with humans? A creepy little boy with creepy little powers? Both? Neither? I don't know.

Perhaps I just got lucky during the accident in that I got ghost powers but not ghostly emotions that should have come along with them. I like to think that no, I got the evil intentions, but my human consciousness is strong enough to suppress them. But that's a load of bull.

Perhaps my mind _has_ been warped by the accident, but my "unfinished business" as a ghost is to protect this town from other ghosts. Or perhaps I'm just overly possessive of my town and feel that the other ghosts can't come in on my territory. It's mine, understand? Mine, mine, MINE!

The human psyche is easy to understand in some ways, but impossible in others. The Ghostly psyche is the same way. Except perhaps that of the Box Ghost. But on the other hand, one could look into _why_ he's obsessed with boxes, and search forever and never find the answer. My psyche is that of a human and that of a ghost. The problem is that I don't know how much of either and how the two interact. The answer lies in what exactly I am.

Am I a human that can access a ghost form and use ghostly attributes? A ghost that can access a human form? Both a ghost and a human at once? Partially a ghost and partially a human? If that's the case, how much of each? Lastly, neither a ghost nor a human, but something else entirely?

I don't know what I am. All I know is that my persona contains elements typical of ghosts and also elements typical of humans. I don't know how much of each or how they interact. And the psyche of each in its purest form is impossible to figure out, all the more so the psyche of each when each is present in unknown amounts and manifests itself in unknown ways and quantities.

So in conclusion, it is not physically possible to understand the inner workings of my mind. This soliloquy began with me believing that I was in fact evil. Now I'm not so sure. Heck, now I have no idea, and even more questions than when I began.

I'm in love with Sam. Vlad is a fruit loop. These are constants. They are perhaps the only two constants that exist in my life. Everything else, including me, is variable and volatile.

I'm so confused.


	38. Obsession, part 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Ghosts are obsessive by nature. It is what keeps them rooted to this plane of existence; what gives them a purpose. Full ghosts lack the ability to experience life, so they are forced to settle for a pale imitation of life. To do this, their obsession is focused on what they feel brings them closer to experiencing the sensation of life. The exact nature of the obsession varies from ghost to ghost; since each had different experiences during life, each finds a different object or concept that reminds them of their lives. 

For example, the Box Ghost spent his life working with boxes. He haunts boxes because they are the strongest reminder of what his life was like. Walker was a warden during life, so he obsesses over rules. Rules bring him closer to the sensations he experienced during life. The same goes for Technus and technology, Ember and her music, and Skulker and the hunt.

The above is simple deductive reasoning, and does not pose much difficulty in pondering. The problem arises when one considers half-ghosts.

Half-ghosts share an obsessive nature with full ghosts because obsession is what allows ghosts to exist in the first place. However, they don't need to spend their afterlives filling every waking moment with a single object or idea in order to palely imitate life because two rings of light later they can lead a true life. Though biologically it's more of a half-life, psychologically they are capable of performing every known human interaction to its fullest extent. They don't need to obsess over something to experience life because they already can experience it.

What, then, does a half-ghost obsess over? My guess is something that they feel to be lacking in their lives, something that would make their lives even fuller than they already are.

For one of the two known halfas, we already know what the object of obsession is. Vlad Masters was in love with his friend Maddie for some time before the lab accident. Afterwards, the ghostly part of his mind twisted that love and warped it into an obsession. Really, it's not his fault that he's a fruit loop. The fault for his behavior lives in his ghost half for transforming an innocent human emotion into a malevolent ghostly one.

The other halfa is more difficult to interpret. My brother hasn't shown any marked fascination with one person, object, or idea. Well, he has for stuff that's space-related, but that's been going on for as long as I can remember and, to my knowledge, hasn't escalated into an obsession rivaling Vlad's with my mom.

Perhaps we should take a cue from Vlad, then, and look into Danny's love life. Sam gripes that he's obsessed with Paulina, but that's just hormones. If he was obsessed with her to the degree that other ghosts are to the objects of their obsession, he would have exposed his secret identity to her in the hopes of her accepting (and loving) him as both Fenton and Phantom. Valerie, then? Nah, that looked to me like nothing more than a shy liking. He's persistent about getting her to accept the fact that he's not evil, but as of yet, no signs of obsessing over her person.

Well, who else is there in Danny's love life? Ah, yes, who else but Sam? Don't get me started on his cluelessness, because that's not the purpose of this discussion. Simply accept as fact that she loves him and he loves her, so we can move on. The question is whether or not he is obsessed with her. I'm willing to discount the Ember incident because he was under a spell, or so Sam told me after the fact.

Let's see, then…he rescued her from the Ghost Zone after that stupid pageant, but that

could have just been his hero complex kicking in, not necessarily an obsession for her.

Wait just one ghost-hunting second! (Geez, my parents can be such loons, it's rubbing off…) Tucker told me that Danny had used his powers to spy on Sam when she was dating that exchange student. What was his name again? Gregor? Elliot? Anyway, I can't worm my way out of that one. That definitely qualifies as jealousy, which, thanks to Danny's ghostly self, easily translates into obsession. I would be worried about that right now save for the delicious irony that Danny apparently obsesses over Sam but can't admit that he loves her.

Well, this was a productive session of peering into the mind of a half-human, half-ghost hybrid. I should go celebrate with Bearbert. If only I could find him…Danny had better not have hidden him in the floorboards again…

* * *

Yes, there will be a part 2 to this. I'm planning on exploring Danny's obsession with ideas, rather than material things, in that part. I'll try to update soon! 


	39. Sense

**Diclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Ever since Danny told me his secret, a lot of things have made more sense to me. Like how he always would run away during a ghost attack, or why Phantom would always hold back when we were fighting. In fact, it explained how I became a ghost hunter in the first place. 

I see now that I've been a pawn this whole time. Vlad Masters, the man I admired and respected for giving me this hi-tech ghost hunting gear, was using me. Turns out he's half ghost as well, and isn't as noble as Danny. He just uses his powers to get what he wants. I have no respect for people who think they're better than everyone else; that's one reason why I hunt ghosts. They think they can just fly around and cause random havoc, without regard for us humans…but that's off-topic. I no longer have any respect for Vlad. Of course, I stay polite to him every time I see him, but that's just because he's Daddy's boss. I pretend to play his game and act like I'm hunting Danny when in fact, all I do is use his equipment to hunt other ghosts, including his other pawn, Skulker. In a way, _I'm_ now using _him_.

It's kind of a neat coincidence-Danny tells me that Vlad has all of his powers and then some, but Vlad uses pink energy instead of green. I get my equipment from Vlad, and it also shoots pink energy. Danny became half ghost in his parents' portal, and he uses green energy. And his parents' weapons also shoot green energy. Weird, huh?

I'm glad Danny told me that he's half ghost. I mean, yeah, I was pissed at first, but over the last couple of months I've generally cooled down. And now I see things so much more clearly than before.


	40. Signal Generator

**Dislaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

An electric guitar is nothing more than a signal generator. 

The strings are actually wires, and small circular magnets are imbedded just below the strings. When one strums the guitar, the metallic strings alter the magnetic field that the magnets produce. This in turn induces a small current in the strings/wires thanks to Faraday's Law. This unique electrical signal, which is determined by which cords are strummed, is sent into an amplifier. Without going into the physics of it, the amplifier, well, amplifies the signal to the degree that it's audible to the human ear.

This much he understood. After all, he _was_ the Master of All Things Electronic and Beeping.

What he couldn't begin to fathom, though, was how she was able to _use_ a signal generator to produce those sounds. How, with her skills, she was able to manipulate a piece of technology better than even _him_.

He chalked it up to a human element that was too variable to fit into his equations. (To him, human and post-human were semantics).

Furthermore, he chalked it up to being the aspect of her that he fell in love with.

The notes she played overwhelmed his audio receptors with the fact that they were beautifully simple yet more complex than anything he could produce with a similar piece of technology. If a ghost possessed a soul, then her music would have moved his.

Her music drew him to her. Once there, he began to notice other things, like her beauty and her personality. They were two of a kind, of sorts. Both wanted world domination. Both wanted to rid the world of the ghost child. Both wanted to use their own technologies to do it. Both wanted their names known to the world.

But he sighed when the truth settled in. She'd never accept him. She hated adults; how would she ever find room in her heart for a…what was the word? Old geezer?

Technus ran a hand through his white hair as he watched her blue locks erupt into flames as everyone chanted her name. Nobody would ever chant _his_ name. He'd always had to do it himself.

He turned away from Ember's concert, the electromagnetic signals coming from her guitar making his stomach to back-flips. He rose into the air and flew off into the depths of the ghost zone, back to his lair. He thought that maybe working on a piece of technology would help clear his mind. After tinkering for an hour or so without really concentrating, he looked down. In front of him stood a six-inch replica of the Pop Princess herself.

_You will remember my name!_ The tiny robot sang, and Technus sighed blissfully.

_I love you, Nikki!_ It cooed. The corners of Technus' mouth perked up.

* * *

FYI, Nikki is short for Nicolai. 

Also, before you say, "Eeeew! TechnusxEmber! That's gross!", just hear me out. (cue five second pause). Okay, I've got nothing. That is kind of gross. But if I can read pieces that are SkulkerxEmber or TechnusxJazz (which I have, over the past week), I think I'm entitled to put this pairing together.


	41. Date

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

A pale hand reached out and knocked on the purple door as it floated through the infinite depths of the Ghost Zone. 

"Who dares to disturb the Box Ghost, master of all things corrugated and square?" The resident of the lair asked, annoyed, as he popped his blue head out of the door.

"Tis I, Youngblood, scourge of the seven ghostly seas!" the visitor shouted back. "I have come to court your fair daughter, Box Lunch!"

"Ah, so you are the boy my daughter has been talking about all this time! Very well, you may take my daughter out on a date, but make sure to have her back by 10:00!"

"Very well. You have my word as a sailor, Box Ghost!" The Box Ghost opened the door wider and allowed Box Lunch to float outside.

"Beware!" he shouted, and then slammed the door shut.

"Hey," the two ghostly children said in sync, then turned away, blushing.

"Uh…shall we go?" Youngblood asked. Box Lunch nodded, and the two laced their fingers together and took off into the Ghost Zone.

It wasn't long before they arrived at a large pirate ship.

"I have a surprise for you," Youngblood said, then put a blindfold over Box Lunch's eyes. The blue ghost giggled as she was led towards the front of the ship. Youngblood removed the blindfold with a flourish, and Box Lunch gasped. The bow of the ship was adorned with a wooden replica of her.

"Youngblood, that's so sweet!" She exclaimed, and planted a kiss on his cheek. The young captain's ghostly pale cheeks turned a light shade of pink. He took Box Lunch's hand and the two of them flew up to the ship's helm just as the crew finished preparing it for the voyage.

"Is everything ready? Then cast off, ye scurry dogs!" the captain shouted.

"Its scurvy dogs," the skeletal parrot on his shoulder corrected.

"What? That doesn't make any sense!" Youngblood asserted as the crew raised the anchor and lowered the sails.

"How do you get them to listen to you so well?" Box Lunch asked.

"You just have to know the right words," Youngblood replied. The ship began moving and it wasn't long before it was moving through a sea made up of ectoplasm. After a little while, they reached a series of swells. Youngblood grasped the steering wheel and expertly maneuvered his ship though the dangerous waves. Box Lunch sighed happily when she saw him dexterously control the boat. Pretty soon, they had cleared the storm and the sailing was smooth. The two of them went right up to the front of the boat.

"Whee!" Box Lunch exclaimed as Youngblood held her up by the waist. "I'm queen of the world!"

"You're queen of my world, fairest Box Lunch," he stated.

"Aw…" Box Lunch cooed, and gave Youngblood a second kiss.

At a quarter to ten, the two young ghosts approached the purple door once more.

"I had a really great time tonight, Youngblood," Box Lunch said.

"Me too. See you soon, then?"

"Yeah…" Instead of going right inside, Box Lunch fidgeted outside the door. Her gaze was focused downward, but every few seconds she flicked her eyes back up at Youngblood expectantly.

"What is it? Is everything okay?" he asked. Suddenly, without warning, she leaned forward and kissed him full on the lips. She backed away, blushing profusely, and hurried over to the door.

"Bye, Youngblood!" She said, then went inside and closed the door.

Youngblood numbly placed a hand to his lips as he floated backwards away from the door, hardly able to believe what had just happened. Then, his emotions got the better of him and his face cracked into a huge smile.

"Wo-hoo!" he whooped, and did a back-flip in mid-air.

* * *

I'm not sure how old Box Lunch or Younblood are supposed to be, and I probably didn't have them act their ages. But I hope you liked this drabble regardless of that.  



	42. Weak

Yes, I know it's been a while. The reason it's been so long is because almost all of my inspiration for these drabbles comes from stuff that happens in school, and school for me doesn't start again until September 6. I've had an idea or two buzz around in my head, but I was never in a position to write it down. This is the first time I've had the opportunity to write down an idea just after it comes to me. So, _viola._

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

What's happening to me?

The first time I ever fought young Daniel, I defeated him easily. Two moves, three tops. He didn't stand a chance. As well he shouldn't. After all, I'm Vlad Plasmius, most powerful ghost in the Ghost Zone. Of course he wouldn't stand a chance against me; he's what, fourteen? Too young to drive and not even in college yet?

But later on, the very next evening, in fact, something happened. My plan for revenge was going perfectly; overshadow Jack, have him dump Maddie and scare everyone away, then comfort Maddie and convince her to stay with me. But Daniel knocked me out of Jack's body. How? He shouldn't have been powerful enough to force me out of somebody. No ghost is strong enough to get me to leave a body once I've decided to possess it, yet he managed it.

The next time we met and engaged in actual combat, I was at diminished strength due to trickery on his part. Furthermore, fighting the ghosts I'd sent to Amity Park had no doubt increased his own strength somewhat. But even so, I should have been powerful enough to defeat him. True, the effort would have drained me, but there's no way he should have beaten me. Although my power wasn't at full capacity, I still possess enough to have overpowered him. So why did I lose?

Then, later on, I suffered two agonizing losses at once. The Behemoth? Feh. I possess enough power to defeat him. It. Whatever. Even with my strength divided in four after I duplicated myself, each fourth far exceeds anything the Behemoth could muster. And yet, the beast _still_ managed to defeat me. I didn't press the issue at the time. Back then, I cut my losses and instead of pursuing my goal of obtaining the Skeleton Key, I chose to acquire a working Ghost Portal. The Skeleton Key could wait. Of course, Daniel would be guarding the portal, but hopefully the myriad of ghost hunters I sent, inept though they may be, could delay him. That evening I was trounced by _Jack Fenton_. The oaf. The idiot. The fool whose demise is my absolute goal, my final intention. Someone as stupid as him couldn't, shouldn't have been able to defeat Vlad Plasmius. But he did. Somehow.

I can understand losing to the Ghost King. Pariah was horribly powerful, even without both the crown and ring at his disposal. I'm not going into that experience.

Later on, though, when Jazzmine had run away to me and I'd gotten Daniel as a consolation prize, the boy somehow managed to wrest the remote controlling his sister from me. Why I did not morph into Plasmius and kept the thing away from him I do not know. I should have been one step ahead of him. But I wasn't. Why, though?

The next time we met, I was weakened by Ecto-Acne. I must say it was a stroke of genius to infect his little friends with the ailment; he'd never have helped me otherwise. But again, I was in a terrible state, and my defeat to Daniel was completely understandable.

The last time we crossed paths, though, gave me much to think about. I had started the fight in a normal fashion; ectoblasting him into the ground and rushing in for hand-to-hand combat, but to my dismay, he was on par with me. Then, when we each fired ectoblasts at each other, the two energies were evenly matched. _Evenly matched!_ That, that _boy_ was able to hold his own against me! Vlad Plasmius! If Danielle hadn't stepped in, the stalemate would have gone on indefinitely!

What's wrong with me? I'm the most feared being in the Ghost Zone, for Maddie's sake! And yet, in my past few scuffles, I've lost. Not only to Daniel, but to the Behemoth and, though I'd rather attend a tea party with the Box Ghost and Klemper to admit it, to Jack. Am I getting weaker over time? Is my power somehow diminishing?

I suppose it's possible that I've already plateaued and now my power is beginning to degenerate over time. But that can't be right; I'm barely older than forty! I can't be past my prime!

Something is wrong with me. Horribly, horribly wrong. And I, Vlad Masters, aka Vlad Plasmius, intend to find out what.


	43. Dude

a/n: Have any of you ever wondered what happened to the surfer dude from _What You Want?_ I had this thought while I was driving home from work today. Enjoy!

Chris and his buddies had just stepped onto the beach after having spent the afternoon surfing. They plunked their surfboards into the sand and sat next to them, catching the glances of many a bikini-clad female beachgoer. After the twentieth time of shaking his long, blonde hair out of his face, Chris suggested that they head up to the bar and get a drink.

"Dudes, wanna come get wasted up at the bar with me?"

"Cha, we're in," the rest of them chorused and they all traipsed over to the beachside bar. They all ordered beers as the bartender flicked on the TV, where the news was on.

"This just in," the anchorman announced. "A ghost kid has just attacked Amity Park and is holding the mayor hostage." The screen revealed a black and white clad teenage ghost with eyes that glowed radioactive green and hair the color of fresh snow with his arm around a short Hispanic man wearing a purple suit.

"Help," the mayor yelled. "Help me!" The two of them floated inside the building, and the doors slammed shut behind them. The second Chris saw the ghost kid, his eyes expanded to the size of saucers.

"Duuude…" he exclaimed.

"What's up, dude?" one of his friends asked.

"That ghost kid…he, like, saved me once."

"No way, dude! When?"

"I was, like, driving through Amity Park once on the way to the beach and was, like, totally stuck in traffic. I was like, 'I wish I could just, like, fly over this traffic,' and this weird voice came over the radio and was like, 'So you have wished it, so shall it be!' and I was like, 'hey, dude, this isn't my station!' but then, this funky green mist came out of the air conditioner and all of a sudden, my car starts floating! And then it zooms forward, like, twenty feet in the air!"

"No way, dude,"

"Yeah, dude, I swear! And then I was, like, screaming my head off, because, like, I was so high up in the air, right? And then that ghost kid from TV suddenly, like, appears in my car, and he's like, 'hey! You're going over the speed limit! And the height limit!' And then this other ghost comes in and he's all like, 'don't worry, Danny. Tucker Phantom is on the case.' And then the two ghost kids start, like, arguing, and meanwhile the car is, like, totally floating out of the city. And I'm all like, 'whoa, hallucination dudes!' because I, like, thought that they were, like, hallucinations or something. But the ghost kids aren't listening to me, right? And since none of us are paying attention to the wheel, the car goes out of control and lands in a farm! And a bunch of wheat comes down out of the farmhouse and buries me, the car, and the two ghost kids. And when I poke my head out of the wheat, a chicken, like, jumps on top of me and starts eating it. And I'm like, 'dude! There's a chicken on my head!' But the two ghost kids keep arguing, and then they, like, fly away."

"Duuude…" one of his friends, Joe, said. Another gave a low whistle.

"That's awesome, dude!" A third surfer, Rick, added.

"I know, dude, right?" Chris exclaimed. They looked towards the bartender to get his input.

"Like, what do you think, dude?" Rick asked him.

"Duuude…" he said slowly.


	44. Ghost Wars

Hey, the line-breaks are working again! SCHWING!

It's been a little longer than I would have liked for an update, but hey, I writes 'em as I thinks 'em. Anyway, I'm sure someone else has taken this scene before I did, but I haven't seen it yet, so I'm not intentionally stealing.

* * *

The two warriors stood on a small catwalk that overlooked the massive chute that extended out from underneath the floating city. They growled at each other and formed the ghostly energy in their hands.

"I won't let you get away this time," Danny spat as the green spectral energy in his hands extended upward and solidified into a four-foot-long sword made up of energy. Vlad merely grinned as he formed a red ecto-saber of his own. The two shot towards each other and their blades locked in battle.

Danny quickly brought his ecto-saber up and to the right in order to strike Vlad's shoulder, but the elder halfa easily parried and flicked his sword up in a technique that caused Danny to overbalance. He nearly went over the edge of the catwalk, but he quickly regained his balance and resumed a fighting stance. The walls of the chute danced with red and green light as the blades danced and crashed against each other.

In a maneuver so quick that Danny could barely see the man move, Vlad came around and cleanly sliced his right arm clean off.

The heat and energy of Vlad's ecto-saber immediately burned the wound shut, so Danny didn't bleed. However, he still felt pain, so he screamed. The pain was so great that he couldn't hold his concentration any longer, so his ecto-saber fizzled and died out. Without the weight of his arm, Danny couldn't balance and he fell over the side of the catwalk. He quickly reached out and grabbed onto the ledge with his left hand, and dangled there helplessly. Vlad stood over him and looked down imperiously. Then, to Danny's surprise, he held out his hand.

"Join me, Daniel," he said. "Come to the Dark Side."

"No!" Danny shouted back. "I'll never join you. You killed my father!"

"No, Daniel," the man replied in a booming voice. "_I_ am your father!"

The shock and surprise of hearing that was too much for the poor boy. He was barely aware of his surroundings as his left hand froze up and let go of the catwalk, and he was barely aware of his lungs screaming as loud as they could as he fell down the chute.

* * *

I'm writing this chapter while working on my application to the University of Wisconsin.

Yes, I'm applying to Wisconsin.

Don't laugh at me.

Anyway, next update as soon as I get inspired. Until then, ttyl!


	45. Paulina Gains Weight

This is dedicated to all of the Paulina-haters. I don't mean to insult people who are obese or overweight in this, so if you are and are insulted from reading it, you have my most sincere apologies.

* * *

"Ghost Boy, save me!" Paulina shrieked as Bertrand, who had morphed into a giant hornet, carried her tens of feet above Amity Park, Danny hot on his heels. Quickly looking around, Bertrand spotted a factory, turned intangible, and flew inside. Danny followed him and found the shape-shifter hovering above a huge vat of some yellow-white substance.

"You want her?" he asked menacingly. "Then have her!" He threw Paulina down into the vat. Danny, enraged, flew towards Bertrand in an attempt to punch him, but when his fist made contact it got stuck in green ectoplasmic goo.

"That won't work on me, punk," Bertrand hissed angrily, and the two began to exchange blows.

Paulina landed in the vat and immediately began to sink. She tried to scream, yell to Phantom to save her from whatever substance she was trapped in, but when she opened her mouth to scream the contents of the vat got into her mouth and she accidentally swallowed them.

Whatever it was, the stuff in this vat tasted _good_.

Since it was so thick, Paulina couldn't swim to the surface. Having no other choice, Paulina sucked in another mouthful of the delicious substance and swallowed it, thinking that maybe she could empty the vat enough for her head to reach the surface.

After a prolonged fight, Danny finally managed to suck Bertrand into the Fenton Thermos. He turned around and planned to go intangible and get Paulina out of what she was trapped in, but to his surprise the vat was nearly empty by the time he'd turned around. He dove into the vat, grabbed Paulina, and hefted her out.

"I'm so glad you're okay," he exclaimed as he made her intangible and caused the stuff hanging on her clothes and body to slide off.

"I'm so glad you came to save me," she replied, and hugged him tightly. Danny wrapped an arm around her waist and flew the two of them out of the building. Out of curiosity, he turned his head around to look at what type of factory they'd been in; if she'd been exposed to dangerous chemicals in that vat, she'd need immediate medical attention. A big sign on the outside of the factory read: "Amity Park Lard Factory". Thinking that there probably wouldn't be any harmful side effects from being exposed to the lard, he shrugged it off and dropped Paulina off at her house. The excitement of the afternoon had begun to wear off, leaving her exhausted, so she changed into a slinky nightgown and went to bed.

The next morning, Paulina slowly woke up and rubbed her eyes. She rolled out of bed and headed to the shower adjoining her room. It was a couple of long seconds before she realized that she was naked; she figured that all the rolling around she had done had caused the nightgown to come off. After all, it was on the skimpy side. She didn't notice the ripped gown under her sheets as she headed into the bathroom.

She squeezed into her shower and turned it on. Funny, she'd never had a problem getting inside her shower before…and she was pretty sure that the door had never had a problem closing…but Paulina wasn't a morning person, and was too tired to pay much heed to these paradoxes.

One would think that after a nice shower, she would have been more awake. But this Latina was _definitely_ not a morning person. She slowly made her way over to her armoire and picked out the usual clothing. She tried to put her bra on, but she couldn't quite get the clasp on. By this time she was a little more awake, although not by much. With a smirk she thought that her cup size must have grown overnight, meaning that she'd be even more gorgeous than before. Then she tried putting on the panties. That was when she started to think that something was wrong. This pair had _never _been this painful to put on before; why today? She tried walking around wearing the panties, and was horrified to find that she was waddling. _Waddling!_ Now seriously worried, she waddled into her bathroom and looked in her mirror.

She nearly fainted.

Looking back at her was a morbidly obese girl. Her face had grown huge jowls and a few extra chins, making it pear-shaped. Her arms had grown a good eight inches of solid flab each. Her stomach protruded twice as far out as her breasts, which had lost their perkiness and had become fat and flabby. And her legs were simply massive. She stumbled over to her scale, almost too afraid to look at the results.

Afterwards, she wished she hadn't.

She weighed in at 350 pounds. Overnight, she'd gained more than two hundred pounds, and every last one of them showed. Bawling, she waddled over to her shower and tried to squeeze in again, but her bulk pressed against all four walls, refusing to let her fully enter. She tried slamming the shower door in to force it to close in on her, but it wouldn't budge. She waddled as fast as her legs could carry her over to her bed and threw herself on, and distinctly heard a few cracks appear in the floor below the bed.

_I'm disgusting! How can I ever be popular again when I've become a whale!_ She screamed to herself, before another thought hit her.

_How will I ever seduce the Ghost Boy now?_

It was at that point that she fainted.


	46. Vlad the Impaler

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

Sam was presently occupied in her favorite Goth bookstore, Skulk and Lurk Books, er, skulking and lurking. She ran a pale index finger along the row of spines when she suddenly stopped. She pulled out an interesting-looking book and scanned the synopsis on the inside front cover. She gasped, her eyes the size of saucers, and dropped the book in shock. She leaned against the bookshelf and gulped in a few breaths of much-needed oxygen, and slowly reached down and retrieved the book. Reading it again just to make sure she hadn't imagined it, she immediately bought the book and ran out of the store.

"Guys, you'll never believe this!" Sam exclaimed as she, Tucker, and Danny met up in the park.

"Calm down, Sam, what is it already?" Tucker asked as his eyes flicked up for a second from the screen of his PDA to shoot an annoyed glance at her. Sam quickly rummaged through the backpack she'd brought and pulled out the book.

"According to this, there was a monarch in Eastern Europe named Vlad the Impaler who committed atrocities so severe that what became the legend of Dracula was based off of him.

"So?" Danny asked.

"Clueless…" Sam muttered. "VLAD the impaler? _VLAD_!"

"Oh!" Danny exclaimed in sudden understanding. "Yeah, I'd always thought that he looked kind of like Dracula when in ghost mode."

"Think there might be a connection between the two?" Sam asked.

"Only one way to find out," Danny asserted as he looked around to make sure that the three of them were the only ones nearby, then transformed. "To Wisconsin!" He shouted, then picked the two of them up and took off.

"You know," Sam noted wryly as she tried vainly to get her wind-tousled hair to go back down, "we could've just taken the Specter Speeder."

"Yeah…maybe…" Danny choked out, then changed back to human from lack of energy and fell down on the ground, panting. When he finally recovered, the three teens ran up to the enormous castle in front of them, disregarding the dairy cows that were pasturing on the grassy lawns all around them. Danny banged on the cheese-shaped knocker. After a couple of minutes, the door was opened by everyone's favorite tall, smarmy, white-haired, middle-aged, cat-needing, billionaire Fruit Loop.

"HI, VLAD!" The three of them shouted as soon as he looked down at them.

"Oh, what stupidity is this?" He asked, annoyed.

"Well, I found out that there used to be this guy named Vlad the Impaler that lived in Europe who spawned the legend of Dracula," Sam began.

"And after hearing about it, we couldn't resist dropping by to visit our favorite perverted Fruit Loop," Danny finished.

"Vlad the…" Vlad began, confused, but immediately perked up. "Oh, you've found out about my namesake! Come in, come in!" He pulled the three of them inside and slammed the huge castle doors shut with a _CLANG_.

"I don't believe I've ever told you this, but my family immigrated here from Eastern Europe many generations ago," Vlad began as he led the three of them through the castle.

"I am the only remaining direct descendent of the feudal lord you mentioned, Vlad the Impaler," he said as they descended a large, spiraling staircase that led to a dank, damp, gloomy, stone dungeon. They passed through several large chambers, one of which contained an annoying blue ghost chained to the wall with glowing green anti-intangibility chains.

"Have you come to free me, the Box Ghost?" he asked hopefully. They ignored him.

"As the last remaining descendant, I have nearly all of Vlad's belongings from when he was a ruler. I keep them down here because the conditions are most like those of the castle he lived in." Vlad led them into a large room that contained several artifacts, including a coat of arms, several coats of armor, and a large, adorned coffin.

"Er…Vlad? What's with the coffin?" Danny asked.

"As you said, people were terribly afraid of my ancestor in his day. When he died, his family did not bury the body, knowing that the villagers were likely to exhume and desecrate it after his death. They kept the body in this coffin and brought it with them to America.

"Geez, no wonder Dracula was based on him," Tucker noted. Vlad chuckled.

"Don't worry, there's nothing to fear. Dracula is just a myth; the corpse in this coffin isn't really a vampire. Anyway, now that you're here, how about some cheese fondue?" The three teens glanced at each other and shrugged.

"Sure," Sam said. Vlad led the three of them out of the chamber, past the chained Box Ghost, and out of the dungeon. He closed the door, bathing the dungeon completely in darkness save for the Box Ghost's blue aura. Nobody noticed the millimeter-wide gap between the coffin and it's lid glow bloodred.

* * *

BTW, that stuff about Vlad the Impaler is true (I think). I really did read in a book that he was the cause of the Dracula myth. 


	47. Pity

**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!**

* * *

I feel bad for him. I really do.

I mean, think about it. He has an unimaginable amount of wealth and power, and yet his life is empty. There are literally billions of people that would give a lung just to have a fraction of what he has, yet he would gladly give it all away just for three things.

He bought a mountain chalet, hired a pilot, and created a horde of mutated ghost animals just to win over my mom and me, while at the same time tried to kill my father. He is so evil, so maniacal, so diabolical…but when I pretended to love him like a father he threw all caution to the winds in favor of an embrace. Yes he's a horrible person, yes he's a crazed-up fruit loop, but in the end, inside he's just a lonely old man.

Vlad, I…I wish you didn't have to concoct such evil plans and elaborate schemes just to get the things you want. I wish you didn't have to live all alone in a big empty castle…I wish you had somebody to love you back, somebody that you didn't have to manipulate and scheme over in order to win over.

To be fair, it isn't entirely his fault. I mean, I'm sure he was an okay person before he got zapped by Dad's portal. I just wish he could let it go, though, instead of constantly wasting precious time trying to get revenge. I'm sure the last twenty years wouldn't have been nearly as bad as they were for him if he hadn't constantly been plotting Dad's downfall. He didn't have any ghosts coming out of a portal that he had to fight; I'm sure that, had he not spent so much time plotting, he could've thoroughly enjoyed using his powers rather than planning on how to use them for revenge. Even if he couldn't become truly happy given time, even if he felt as though his ghost half separated him from the rest of humanity and he could never fit in, at the very least he could have grown to become content with himself.

Wisdom comes with age, right? Wouldn't he have learned to drop his grudge over time?

I see the swish of a white cape as I finish my evening's patrol of Amity Park.

"Why hello, Daniel," he sneers. A single tear rolls down my cheek as I think about all of the mental trauma he's probably gone through over the last two decades. It didn't have to be this way, I scream inside of my head. Things could've been different! You could've been different!

I wipe the tear away. Pitying the man standing, er…floating, in front of me won't solve any of my problems, much less change who he is. I can't change what he's done in the past; the most I can ever hope to do is change who he is in the future. After all, if I changed my future, surely I can change his.

"Let's get this over with, Plasmius," I sigh as I slip into a fighting stance.


	48. Satisfaction

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom!!**

* * *

Knock, knock, knock_

"I'm coming!" Danny called as he ran down the stairs and opened the door, revealing one Tucker Foley.

"Hey, Tuck."

"Hey, Danny. Is Sam here yet?"

"Nah, she'll be here in a little bit. Why?"

"Good. Come on!" Tucker grabbed Danny's wrist and dragged him up into his room, and sat him down in front of his computer.

"Er…Tucker? What are you doing?" The raven-haired teen asked, confused, as his friend whipped an iPod out of one of the many pockets of his green cargo pants.

"Shut up at watch," Tucker muttered distractedly as he plugged his iPod into Danny's computer and called up iTunes. He clicked on a song on his iPod called "Satisfaction," and added it to Danny's library.

"Okay, what's 'Satisfaction?' and why can't Sam be here when you put it on my iTunes?" Tucker just grinned as someone knocked on Danny's front door.

"I think you should get that," he said, and elbowed Danny in the ribs lightly. Danny just knew that something was up as he stood up to open the door for Sam. The two friends greeted each other at the door, then came up to Danny's room. Tucker was grinning like a maniac when they arrived.

"Okay Tucker, what's up?" Danny asked suspiciously.

"Why? What's he been doing?" Sam asked him.

"He just put some random song on my iTunes and didn't explain why."

"Really? Let's hear it!"

"Eh…I think I'll leave you two alone," Tucker said as he sped out of the room and quickly shut the door behind him. He sighed, relieved, when neither of them tried to open the door and question them.

"Now, on to business…" he said to himself. He pulled the iPod out of his pocket and headed for Jazz's room.

Meanwhile, Danny was clicking on the icon for the song on his iTunes.

"'Satisfaction'?" Sam read out loud. "I hope it's nothing perverted, although knowing Tucker…"

"I guess we'll just have to find out," Danny said as the music began. The music pounded on his eardrums and he began feeling strange. Immediately, he felt his heart rate increase and his blood pressure rise in accordance with the fast beat. He looked over at Sam and saw that she was sweating slightly. Now Danny was slightly perturbed; as Sam had told him on more than one occasion, Goth's _never _sweat. Simmer, maybe, but _not_ sweat. There was something suspicious about this music…but Danny was pulled out of his thoughts as he felt Sam take his hand in her own.

"Dance with me," she said, and with the music blasting and taking over his senses, he couldn't help but nod. Their dance was intense, passionate, and energetic, just like the music overriding their senses. They spun and twirled around the room, and as Sam came up from being dipped by Danny for the fourth time, their faces became almost uncomfortably close. They leaned closer together, and closer, and closer…

As the music ended, Danny fell out of his room. His hair was extremely ruffled, and his face was covered in purple lipstick. He fell out of the room and landed on the hallway floor breathing heavily. Sam, who was just as disheveled as Danny, landed on top of him a couple of seconds later, gasping for air just as much as him. A couple of minutes later, Tucker stepped into the hallway, his beret missing and only one headphone from his iPod in place. He was grinning from ear to ear.

"Satisfied?" He asked them smugly.

"I have to say, Tuck…wait a second, was that Jazz's room you were just in?" Danny asked angrily.

"Uh…well, you see…" the other boy replied nervously, but was silenced by the killer intent that was positively rolling off of Danny.

"Gottagobye!" He shouted, and a second later the only thing left where Tucker had been was a cloud vaguely shaped like the chocolate-skinned boy.

"I'm gonna kill you!" Danny roared as he transformed, turned intangible, and shot out of FentonWorks with the speed of a bullet.


	49. College

A groggy, disheveled, bleary-eyed, seventeen-year-old Danny Fenton nursed his aching hand as he rested his head on the kitchen table, college applications littered around the table.

"I hate college," he moaned exhaustedly.

"That's what you get for waiting until the last second to do all of your applications," Jazz chastised as she entered the kitchen. She was on her winter break from Yale, and so had come home in order to help her baby brother deal with all of the applications from hell.

"Yeah, well, I was kinda hoping that I'd get accepted early decision," Danny replied. Jazz shrugged.

"Well, I bet you'd get accepted into the University of Wisconsin. I mean, you've got plenty of legacy there."

"Already did," Danny said as he reached his hand into the pile of paperwork, searched around a bit, and pulled out the acceptance letter. "But you're loopier than Vlad if you think that I'm going to college even remotely close to where he lives." Jazz sat down next to him.

"So where are you applying?"

"_Everywhere_!" Danny exclaimed, frustrated at the mountain of paperwork in front of him. "I don't even know anything about half of these schools! How am I supposed to write an essay about why I want to go there?"

"If you don't know anything about them, why are you applying there?"

"Because mom and dad say they're good schools, so I'm taking their word for it."

* * *

meh. I hate college applications. 


	50. Sunrise

Danny sighed contentedly as he floated above the clouds. The rising sun was still nothing more than an aura of light that faintly illuminated the blue background, creating a thin line of light blue surrounded by the darker midnight blue. Below him, the scattered clouds were illuminated by the early rays, dyeing them a bright red in contrast to the dark sky below and around them.

"Like so many embers in a dying campfire," the halfa mused to himself. The Fenton's weren't exactly well-known for their camping trips, but they'd been on enough for Danny to at least make the connection.

Unlike many people for whom sunset is their favorite part of the day, Danny loved watching the sunrise. It was a simple beauty unaffected by the events of the day, and a chance to start fresh and hopefully make up for past mistakes.

Besides, less ghosts came through the portal during the day, so sunrise typically meant a much-needed break for Amity Park's hero.

The sun had risen further, to the point at which red and yellow bars of light augmented the azure ones. Danny sighed and held out his left hand. A ring of white light formed around his elbow, then split in two as the two rings traveled up and down his arm. As they passed over him, they morphed black and white HAZMAT into the sleeve of a T-shirt and an arm. Once one ring reached Danny's shoulder and the other passed his fingertips, they vanished. Danny checked his watch, then undid the partial transformation and allowed his arm revert back to ghost form. He began the flight back home…sunrise or no sunrise, he still had to get to school.

* * *

I wrote this one while on the plane to Prague. That was one helluva sunrise... 


	51. I Eat Babies

Danny, Sam, and Tucker were standing outside a restaurant in Krakow, Poland. They had just finished eating, and had gone out for some air. They watched as people passed by them, chatting away in Polish.

"Stupid school trip," Danny groused as he clutched his jacket closer to himself for warmth. "Why do all the Seniors have to come here anyway?" Sam shrugged.

"Look on the bright side," she said. "Here, nobody speaks English, so nobody knows what we're talking about. Watch:" She walked up to a corpulent old woman and stood right in her path.

"Excuse me, but you must be the fattest lady I've ever seen," she said. The woman gave Sam a kind smile, said something in Polish, and continued on her way.

"Cool!" Tucker exclaimed. "Lemme try!" He saw a small family walking just in front of him and said, "hi! I'd like to eat your babies!" Just as the family passed him, the people froze. They turned around slowly.

"What did you just say?" The father asked incredulously, in perfect English. Tucker, taken by surprise, sputtered embarrassedly.

"What he means to say," Sam interrupted smoothly, "is that he eats veal. Baby cows. Which happens to be sick and wrong because of the way the animals are treated before they're executed! Did you know…"

"Okay Sam, I think they get it," Danny said. "Sorry about that," he said to the family. The Poles, still slightly weirded out, backed away from the trio and headed away quickly. Danny and Sam cracked up.

"How was I supposed to know that they knew English?" Tucker asked indignantly.

"You weren't, but it was still funny," Danny said. Still laughing, the three headed inside.

* * *

Remember my friend that I told you about before? The one that said 'Every time I take the bus, a little piece of me dies' and 'This? this is a muffin'? Yeah, that was him again. I wasn't actually there when he said this, so this drabble is based on other people telling me about the event. 


	52. Substitute

The bell rang and Danny, on time for once, sat in-between Sam and Tucker in first-period English. Expecting Mr. Lancer, the trio was surprised to see someone else walk into the classroom. The man was young, in his mid-thirties. He was slightly overweight, and his face was pudgy. He was wearing an odd smirk that seemed to be plastered on his fleshy lips.

"Hi! I'm Mr. Book. Good morning everyone!" he said. Several people grunted a reply, what with them being teenagers early in the morning and all. Danny shot Sam and Tucker a look of exasperation at the corniness of the English teacher's surname. Mr. Book frowned, though he still managed to keep the smirk on his face.

"That wont' do at all," Book said in what they could by now identify as a South African accent. "Let's try again. Good morning!"

"Good morning," the class chanted blandly. Book smirked/smiled.

"Now, I want to get to know all of you a bit better, so we'll play a game called Two Truths and a Lie. I'll say three statements, one of which is a lie. You have to choose which ones are true. Ready: okay. One: I was once cauld in a stampede of zebra." He pronounced the word 'zebra' weirdly, with a long 'e' instead of a short one, and the class chuckled a bit.

"Second, " he continued, unfazed, "I once rode an elephant. And thirdly, I'm from South Africa." He began chuckling childishly. "Okay, I know you're supposed to guess, but I'll tell you anyway. The lie is that I once rode an elephant. I never did, but I did ride an ostrich, which is the second-fastest land animal. Now, I want everyone to open your book of texts."

"Your textbooks," He added when he saw the class's confused stares. "Open up your textbooks to page three hundred and forty six, read the piece of literature found within, and summarize it. That is all." He gave them all a triumphant smirk and sat back down.

"What the heck is with this guy?" Sam whispered to the others. They shrugged.

"Excuse me," Book said, upon hearing Sam's whisper. "Please cease and desist being garrulous and loquacious, and continue with the assignment. You're in high school now; I shouldn't have to change your diapies and remind you to wash behind your ears. I shouldn't have to remind you to do the assignment." The smirk still plastered on his face, he sat back down at his desk. Danny's ghost sense conveniently went off just then, and a second later the Fright Knight appeared behind him.

"I will destroy you!" the knight shouted as he slashed at the halfa. Danny dodged, and kicked the Spirit of Halloween so that he went flying. His sword, which he flailed wildly throughout his impromptu flight, cut across Book's arm as the Fight Knight crashed into the blackboard behind the teacher's desk. There was an audible _pop_, and the substitute teacher vanished.

"What should we do?" Dash yelled.

"Who cares, now that Smirky McSmirkSmirk's gone?" asked Sam.

"For once, I agree with Goth Girl. Besides, now the ghost boy will come and save me!" Paulina exclaimed, little hears appearing in her eyes. Everyone backed away from the crazed fan-girl slowly.

When Book reappeared he was standing waist deep in the ocean. A large wave crashed over him…and the salt water got inside the gash on his arm.

"Yaah!" He screamed as he rubbed the blindingly painful wound. He picked his way through the coral reef he was standing in, cutting up his feet in the process, and finally made it to a nearby beach. Ignoring the pain of sand getting in his coral-wounds, he explored the small island and soon realized that it was deserted and empty save for a couple of palm trees sticking out of the sand.

"No food…" he muttered. A second later, a coconut fell from one of the palm trees and landed on his head. Rubbing the top of his head vigorously, he smirked triumphantly at the presence of food, until realization dawned on him, giving him a cold feeling in the pit of his stomach.

"I'm allergic to coconuts," he wailed. "Noooooooo!"

* * *

I feel kinda bad about posting this, since I got to know the guy that it's about a lot better since I wrote it, and he's actually really nice. But...anything for my readers, right? 


End file.
